BRASS
MONKEY H3 R*N # 247: Donnie the Retard FINALLY Hares!
When: Saturday, July 13th, at 3:00pm!
Where: Shadowbend Park
4192
Lake Woodlands Drive
The
Woodlands, TX 77381
Hares: Donnie the Retard & One Shot One Kill
Why: Because you like drinking, period.
Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of
clothes, you'll get dirty), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent (if applicable), sunscreen,
$$ for haberdashery: shirts from $15+, patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for
beer of course.
D’erections:
FROM
HOUSTON: Take I-45 North or Hardy Toll Road until it deadends into I-45. Take
exit 76B for Woodlands Parkway. Take that ramp over the freeway and straight
for 3-4 miles, then turn right on Gosling Road. Go straight for a mile or so
and turn left at the second light, Lake Woodlands Drive. Go for just over a
half mile and the park will be on your left just past Shadowbend Drive. Look
for assholes.
Sidenote:
Ladies
& Gents, it's going to be a big week. Some *shit* is happening this week.
Get the fuck ready. Firstishly, Donnie the Retard -- yes, THE Donnie the Retard
-- will be haring!! What?! Shock 'n'awe. Donnie, who was supposed to have hared
like two fucking trails by now, will be laying his FIRST trail of the year!
Wooooohooooo!! We haven't gone full retard in a while. But wait, there's more!
Donnie and ESPN's child, like, actual child, will be co-haring with him! That's
right, this will be One Shot One Kill's virgin lay! I think? Maybe ESPN was
pregnant there for a while and doing some haring, maybe that counts? In any
case, this will be the first time she can be put to work carrying flour, so
BAM, upgrade. Since she will be too young for circle, Donnie will be drinking
for BOTH hares. So that'll be fun. Per el Retard, it will be a "shady run
with some shiggy mixed in." Who knows what he means by shady, maybe
there's homeless people on trail. You never know. Also, "walker friendly,
lots of poison ivy, water crossings, and refreshing buzz balls at the beer
stop. Under 12 miles guaranteed."
What’s
the worst that could happen? We shall see…
Questions?
Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor
Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's
#: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor
Spork
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