Tuesday, March 19, 2019

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 239 - Spork & Cum-Puss' Analversary Trail!


BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 239 - Spork & Cum-Puss' Analversary Trail!

When: Saturday, March 23rd, at 3:00pm! ***NOTE THE START TIME!***

Where: Mountain Cypress Trail
Spring, Texas 77389

Hares: Cocktor Spork & Cum-Puss

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes, you'll get dirty), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent (if applicable), sunscreen, $$ for haberdashery: patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Take I-45 North or Hardy Toll Road to Grand Parkway (TX-99) and go West - that means left. Take to Gosling Road and exit; go North - that means right. Go for almost two miles and turn right onto Hampton Pointe Boulevard, Hampton Pointe subdivision. Take all the way until it deadends onto Mountain Cypress Trail, then turn right. Take that street while it curves and we'll be towards the end in the undeveloped area. Look for assholes.

Sidenote:
FROM THE HARES: Many moons ago, when Bush was still the president, when nazis were still bad, while R. Kelly was busy making tapes, Cocktor Spork and Cum-Puss met at a Goodwill in California, and Cum-Puss’ anus was never the same. Now, fifteen effing years later from that day in 2006, the gays are now celebrating their:
        Analversary: March 23rd, 2008
        Engagement: March 23rd, 2011
        Wedding: March 23rd, 2014
        This Fucking Hash: 5th Fucking Wedding Analversary!
So, come out – to the hash or of the closet – maybe catch the gay, maybe take a rainbow to the ass, and maybe taste the rainbow… the possibilities are endless! Trail will be 3-ish miles? I think? The start is in the back of a neighborhood where they are finishing incomplete houses, so look for empty lots and bad decisions! Good shiggy, one beer check, and a gay old time. Since the gays control the weather and such, we’ll decide once it gets closer how we’ll arrange that. Bring a change of clothes and shoes regardless. See your buns there!

What’s the worst that could happen? We shall see…

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork

Tuesday, March 05, 2019


BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 238 - The First Anal Choke-a-Chup Trail!

When: Saturday, March 8th, at 2:00pm!

Where: Bear Branch Dog Park
5200 Research Forest Drive
The Woodlands, TX 77381

Hares: Choker Stroker & KatchUp

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes, you'll get dirty), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent (if applicable), sunscreen, $$ for haberdashery: patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Take I-45 North or Hardy to until it deadends into I-45. Take exit 77 toward Lake Woodlands Drive / Research Forest Drive / Tamina Road. Go to Research Forest Drive and turn left. Go for three miles and the park will be ON YOUR RIGHT just past Shadowbend Road. Look for assholes.

Sidenote:
FROM THE HARES: Welcome my pretty ones to the Choke Chup trail. We are happy to be haring a trail that is surely going to end with some choking. This is a house warming party/trail so there shall be shelter and Whors d'oeuvre at the end. We would like to have this be a stock the bar event if you are feeling generous. The weather predictor says its gonna be cold and rainy so be prepared. The trail will be dog friendly and the dogs may get to sniff a new asshole at the start, so that's a plus.

What’s the worst that could happen? We shall see…

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork