Monday, September 17, 2018

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 226 - Ivanna Hairy Buttchug & Indiana Bones and the Temple of Poon's B00B n' DICK Birfday Extravaganza!


BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 226 - Ivanna Hairy Buttchug & Indiana Bones and the Temple of Poon's B00B n' DICK Birfday Extravaganza!

When: Saturday, September 22nd, at **3:00pm!**

Where: Target
32858 FM 2978 Road
Magnolia, TX  77354
*Park in the Target parking lot against the Research Forest side*

Hares: Ivanna Hairy Buttchug & Indiana Bones and the Temple of Poon

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes, you'll get dirty), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent (if applicable), sunscreen, $$ for haberdashery: patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON:
I-45 North or Hardy Toll Road until it dead ends into I-45. Take the exit for TX-242 West/College Park Drive.  Take the feeder to the light, then turn left.  Go for like 2.5 miles, then turn left on Green Bridge Drive.  Take that until it dead ends into Research Forest Drive, then turn right.  Take that all the way until you see a big ass Target on your right, then park in the parking lot nearest you next to Target.  Look for assholes.

Sidenote:
FROM THE HARES: This will be Indiana Bones' and Ivanna Hairy Buttchug's combined BIRFDAY trail.  We will celebrate with a beer check, some sort of booze check, and we may leave other birthday gifts on trail, too!  Trail is dog friendly, shaded, and mostly dry with some really nice shiggy!

What’s the worst that could happen? We shall see…

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork


Thursday, September 06, 2018

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 225 - Spork’s Nighttime BDay GayDay Trail!


BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 225 - Spork’s Nighttime BDay GayDay Trail!

When: Saturday, September 8th, at *****7:00pm!*****

Where: Sawmill Park
2200 Millpark Drive
The Woodlands, TX 77380

Hare: Cocktor Spork

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes, you'll get dirty), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent (if applicable), sunscreen, $$ for haberdashery: patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON:
I-45 North or Hardy Toll Road until it dead ends into I-45. Take Exit 73 for Rayford/Sawdust. Turn left at the light (Sawdust), and go straight for like two miles. Turn left onto Millpark Drive - directly past Sawmill Road, the park is on your left. Look for assholes.

Sidenote:
FROM THE HARE: Ladies & Gents, Boys & Girls, ‘tis that time a year again. The time when you come wish Spork good luck for another year of gay-llivanting around, doing Spork things. So I, Cocktor Spork, shall in turn give you a short and sweet little trail that you will no doubt love. BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE! Also happening on this day, for the first time EVER, The Woodlands will be having a PRIDE festival for all the gays and those who have the body of a gay, but say they aren’t gay, even though they say it with dicks falling out of their mouths. And hags, they’re there, too. Now, because people in The Woodlands are rich and don’t understand how the gays work, their festival is from 11:00am – 5:00pm. Gays don’t even get out of bed until 5:00pm. Anywho, I will of course be attending, because, duh: unicorns, rainbows, booze, drag queens, all the things. So, I will go there and be merry, drinking alllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll day, and then I will come and LIVE LAY, yes LIVE LAY, this glorious trail for you fine folks at 7:00pm in the evening!!! NOTE THE FUCKING TIME! So, bring a fucking headlamp. Seriously, it’ll be darkish. There will be some urban, some shiggy, and have a beer check on top! At the beer check, you will catch a rare glimpse of the Cum-Puss, out of his natural habitat, most likely gnawing on some kind of noodle or meat-stick. So, cum one, cum all, and cum in the evening with the rest of us!

What’s the worst that could happen? We shall see…

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork