Tuesday, February 19, 2019


BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 237 - Brass Monkey 9th Analversary & First Ever Expeditionary Hash!

When: Saturday, February 23rd, at 2:00pm!

Where: City of Conroe WWTP (Wastewater Treatment Plant)
2499 Sgt Ed Holcomb Blvd S
Conroe, TX  77304

Hare: Lil' Pussy

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes, you'll get dirty), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent (if applicable), sunscreen, $$ for haberdashery: patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Take I-45 North or Hardy to until it deadends into I-45.  Take exit 84B toward South Frazier Street/TX-75/Texas 336 Loop. Turn left onto S Loop 336 W and go for about a mile and a half.  Turn left onto Sgt Ed Holcomb Blvd S and go alllllll the way until it deadends.  Look for assholes.

Sidenote:
In February 2010, the Brass Monkey hash was birthed, and the northside hasn't been the same since.  Over the last 9 years, we've done some crazy shit, and it has somehow only ended up in two arrests. (One was a VooDoo hasher and one was KatchUp, go figure).  Each year, around this time, the Analversary trail is usually laid by Twinkle Ties, as it is also his birthday hash.  This year, however, since he is up in the coldness that is Minnesota, Lil' Pussy will be stepping in to lay his long awaited Expeditionary Hash!  You can expect 3-5 miles of solid shiggy, at least one beer check, and a reminder of what a fucking shiggy trail is all about.  According to the hare, there are hospitals and vet clinics around just in case, as well as behavioral health hospital for the other half of the group. Make sure to bring a change of clothes and warm shit for circle as there is a high chance of rain!

What’s the worst that could happen? We shall see…

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork

Wednesday, February 06, 2019



BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 236 - Womb Raider and Dresses with Wolves' Analversary!

When: Saturday, February 9th, at 2:00pm!

Where: *George Mitchell Preserve / Rob Fleming Park*
AFTER 6000 Creekside Forest Drive
The Woodlands, TX 77389.
(NOT EXACT ADDRESS).

Hare: Womb Raider and Dresses with Wolves

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes, you'll get dirty), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent (if applicable), sunscreen, $$ for haberdashery: patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Take I-45 North or Hardy to TX-99/ Grand Parkway West. Exit at Gosling. Go right/north on Gosling for about 3 miles. Turn left at Creekside Forest. Go to the traffic circle (round-about) and take first right onto Creekside Forest Drive. George Mitchell Preserve trailhead is on the right and a large dirt parking lot next to that.

Sidenote:
FROM THE HARES: It’s time to celebrate another year sans murder or divorce err I mean happily married bliss. This trail is thru territory about as virginal as I am. HOWEVER as familiar as the trail will be, much like Dresses with Wolves’s dick after 20+ years of marriage, it should still somehow manage to be loads of fun. Expect a little over 3 miles with water crossings. It might be a bit chilly for circle so there will be a propane heater or 2 to warm up the pack. There will be 1 manned beer check and 1 unmanned Steel Reserve check. Beer check will be some nice craft beer since we’re not complete assholes. I am also making some delicious homemade baked goods of some sort at circle.

What’s the worst that could happen? We shall see…

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork