BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 257 – The Something-th
Anal Brass Monkey Beer Mile!
When: Saturday, November 30th, at 2:00pm! (NOTE THE START TIME CHANGE)
Where: Venture Tech Park
When: Saturday, November 30th, at 2:00pm! (NOTE THE START TIME CHANGE)
Where: Venture Tech Park
8402 New Trails Drive
The Woodlands, TX 77381
Hares: Cocktor Spork
Why: Because you like drinking, period.
Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag, warm clothes, bug spray, PI repellent (if applicable), $$ for haberdashery: shirts from $15+, patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.
D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Take I-45 North or Hardy until it dead-ends into I-45 to exit 77 toward Lake Woodlands Dr/Research Forest Dr/Tamina Rd. Go to the light and turn left on Research Forest Drive. Go for about 2.0 miles, then turn right onto New Trails Drive. Take that for about a half mile and look for a pond on your right just past Technology Forest Drive. Turn in there, park to the right, and look for assholes.
Sidenote:
FROM THE HARES: “Tis the season… to not have a hare for the trail. We have been able to make it a whole year since our least beer mile, and since we aren’t able to find anyone who will be able to get our of their Turkey-coma to hare on Saturday, we will be doing the Brass Monkey Beer Mile!! How is it different than a traditional beer mile, you ask? Well, instead of drinking four 12-oz beers, you have to drink a whole fucking brass monkey. Think you can handle that? Great, then bring it! Plan to run (4) quarter miles, drink an entire monkey, then get continue drinking in circle thereafter. What could go wrong?! Plan on seeing people you don’t get to see often because their families are in town and they are looking for an excused to GTFO of their house. Seriously, it’s a thing. You can plan on it being… 1 mile. Dog friendly? I mean, sure? But they’ll probably hate it since it’s not like, you know, a real trail. Make sure to RSVP so we know how many monkeys to purchase!!
What’s the worst that could happen? We shall see…
Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
Hares: Cocktor Spork
Why: Because you like drinking, period.
Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag, warm clothes, bug spray, PI repellent (if applicable), $$ for haberdashery: shirts from $15+, patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.
D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Take I-45 North or Hardy until it dead-ends into I-45 to exit 77 toward Lake Woodlands Dr/Research Forest Dr/Tamina Rd. Go to the light and turn left on Research Forest Drive. Go for about 2.0 miles, then turn right onto New Trails Drive. Take that for about a half mile and look for a pond on your right just past Technology Forest Drive. Turn in there, park to the right, and look for assholes.
Sidenote:
FROM THE HARES: “Tis the season… to not have a hare for the trail. We have been able to make it a whole year since our least beer mile, and since we aren’t able to find anyone who will be able to get our of their Turkey-coma to hare on Saturday, we will be doing the Brass Monkey Beer Mile!! How is it different than a traditional beer mile, you ask? Well, instead of drinking four 12-oz beers, you have to drink a whole fucking brass monkey. Think you can handle that? Great, then bring it! Plan to run (4) quarter miles, drink an entire monkey, then get continue drinking in circle thereafter. What could go wrong?! Plan on seeing people you don’t get to see often because their families are in town and they are looking for an excused to GTFO of their house. Seriously, it’s a thing. You can plan on it being… 1 mile. Dog friendly? I mean, sure? But they’ll probably hate it since it’s not like, you know, a real trail. Make sure to RSVP so we know how many monkeys to purchase!!
What’s the worst that could happen? We shall see…
Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor
Spork
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