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BMH3# CHRISTMAS PARTY 2024!!!
When:
Friday, December 13th at 7:00pm!!!Where:
Maison du PoonChug86 Sunlit Grove
The Woodlands, TX 77382
30.212852646305969, -95.52401180201169
https://maps.app.goo.gl/wiQe2XXdhdRg2QgC9
There's hashers everywhere
What's this?
They're wearing slutty underwear
What's this?
I can't believe my eyes, I must be dreaming
Wake up, Spork, this isn't fair
What's this?
What's this? What's this?
There's something very wrong
What's this?
They're singing hashing songs
What's this?
The floors are lined with little passed out creatures
Everybody seems so wasted
Oh no, now they're getting naked?
What's this?!
I'll tell you what it is! It's the Brass Monkey's Second AИAL Holiday Party! That's right, since we had very little brain trauma and no pressed charges after last year, we've decided to try this shit again! Since every fucking Saturday in December is taken already, we're doing it on a Friday! And not just any Friday, FRIDAY THE 13TH! So the thème will be "Nightmare Before Hashmas!" So finish off your weekly chores, grab your best slut and dry mouth combatant, and HEAD on over!
There will be a white elephant gift exchange (~$15), and a TALLBOY ROULETTE! What does that mean? It means bring a $15 white elephant gift you can part with (it can be funny, slutty, naughty, stupid, really any word you could describe a Brass Monkey with) and exchange for another gift, and one tallboy of your choosing! We will bring brown paper bags (because we're classy like that), hide the tallboys within said brown paper bags, and people will get one that they randomly select that they'll get to enjoy. (Heartburn meds not included)
What else do you need to bring? Your own damn booze. We've seen you people drink. We know what you are capable of. Will there be a random can of Lone Star somewhere you can probably drink? Maybe... but I sure wouldn't count on it. However, there will be food to eat! If you want to bring a little side to share, feel free. However, the homeowners said they will be making some nice warm food for us, so prepare your stomachs! (And probably your anus)
What can you count on? Probably getting slutty in the hot tub time machine once the festivities are done. BUTT, before you get into your Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini, wear yourself a tacky holiday sweater or Nightmare Before Hashmas outfit! Xmas? Sure! Chanukkah? Why not! Caroling dogs? Sounds great! Ketchup's Butthole blown up on a sweater? Please no.
•A tallboy drink of your choosing
•Your swimsuit
•Your beverage of choice
You won't want to miss it!
0n-0n Bitches!
Cocktor Spork
From The Hosts:
What's this? What's this?There's hashers everywhere
What's this?
They're wearing slutty underwear
What's this?
I can't believe my eyes, I must be dreaming
Wake up, Spork, this isn't fair
What's this?
What's this? What's this?
There's something very wrong
What's this?
They're singing hashing songs
What's this?
The floors are lined with little passed out creatures
Everybody seems so wasted
Oh no, now they're getting naked?
What's this?!
I'll tell you what it is! It's the Brass Monkey's Second AИAL Holiday Party! That's right, since we had very little brain trauma and no pressed charges after last year, we've decided to try this shit again! Since every fucking Saturday in December is taken already, we're doing it on a Friday! And not just any Friday, FRIDAY THE 13TH! So the thème will be "Nightmare Before Hashmas!" So finish off your weekly chores, grab your best slut and dry mouth combatant, and HEAD on over!
There will be a white elephant gift exchange (~$15), and a TALLBOY ROULETTE! What does that mean? It means bring a $15 white elephant gift you can part with (it can be funny, slutty, naughty, stupid, really any word you could describe a Brass Monkey with) and exchange for another gift, and one tallboy of your choosing! We will bring brown paper bags (because we're classy like that), hide the tallboys within said brown paper bags, and people will get one that they randomly select that they'll get to enjoy. (Heartburn meds not included)
What else do you need to bring? Your own damn booze. We've seen you people drink. We know what you are capable of. Will there be a random can of Lone Star somewhere you can probably drink? Maybe... but I sure wouldn't count on it. However, there will be food to eat! If you want to bring a little side to share, feel free. However, the homeowners said they will be making some nice warm food for us, so prepare your stomachs! (And probably your anus)
What can you count on? Probably getting slutty in the hot tub time machine once the festivities are done. BUTT, before you get into your Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini, wear yourself a tacky holiday sweater or Nightmare Before Hashmas outfit! Xmas? Sure! Chanukkah? Why not! Caroling dogs? Sounds great! Ketchup's Butthole blown up on a sweater? Please no.
So, in conclusion, BRING:
•$15 white elephant gift•A tallboy drink of your choosing
•Your swimsuit
•Your beverage of choice
You won't want to miss it!
0n-0n Bitches!
Cocktor Spork
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