BMH3 #329 – 09/03/2022: Cocktor Spork & Indiana Bones and the Temple of Poon's AИAL Birfday Trail!

BMH3 #328 – 09/03/2022: Cocktor Spork & Indiana Bones and the Temple of Poon's AИAL Birfday Trail!

When:

• Saturday, September 3, 2022
• Main Pack 3PM show, 3:30PM Go
• Manned Beer Check!

Where:

Albury Trails Estates Recreational Center
30.068883, -95.579928
10819 Silver Shield Way, Tomball, TX 77375

Hares:

Cocktor Spork & Indiana Bones and the Temple of Poon

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:
Ladies, Gentlemen, and others, we've survived another year!  And for those of you who have made it this far, your illustrious hares will now attempt to kill you off with our AИAL BIRFDAY TRAIL!  If you're expecting something amazing, go fuck yourself and come again another day.  Otherwise, you can expect 4-ish miles with shiggy, water crossings, scenic highway-adjacent touring, and most likely some fences that our eScouting did not show.  #ThanksGoogleMaps.  There will be a manned beer check, and lots of shit to complain about.  This is virgin territory with a virgin on-after that will not want to be missed!  See you there!  

Bring:

WATER, IT IS HOT!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.

FROM Twinkle Toes:

WE HAVE SURVIVED!! Since we're all vaccinated(you're vaccinated, right??!) and Covid numbers are going down like your Mom, the Brass Monkey hash will be returning to a more normal format!  

•YES we will have group start times!
•YES we will be having circles!
•YES we will have BEER AND MONKEYS!!!
•YES we will have $5 Hash Cash

Buuuuuutttt since Covid isn't 100% gone we're going to have a few changes:

•If covid numbers are up, Hares will lay trail A to A or A to A' - NO CARBACKS.
•Bring a drinking vessel! no more passing monkeys around the circle - and don't put the mouth of the 40 on the rim of your vessel.
•There will be hand sanitizer by the snacks and coolers. USE IT before touching common surfaces.
•Everyone has different comfort levels, if someone wants to keep their distance, or wear a mask, Respect their wishes.
•THE FRB helmet... how the fuck did we ever allow a cootie catcher like that to exist... Not sure


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork

 

BMH3 #328 – 08/20/2022: Fool Me Twice, hared by Penis Fly Crap

When:

Saturday,August 20, 2022
• Main Pack 3PM show, 3:30PM Go
• Manned Beer Check!

Where:

Champion Forest Park - 9650 Cypresswood Dr. -  Houston
29.991275246273269, -95.55185462213969
https://goo.gl/maps/u4wCPtZH2wF8YbQk8

Hares:

Penis Fly Crap

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:
Trail will have shade, shiggy, creek crossings, mud, fairways, poison ivy, and plenty of water for dogs along the way. Distance will be appropriate for August heat. A' to A'.  Cold beer and other beverages will be provided, along with snacks at the end.

Bring:

WATER, IT IS HOT!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


FROM Twinkle Toes:

WE HAVE SURVIVED!! Since we're all vaccinated(you're vaccinated, right??!) and Covid numbers are going down like your Mom, the Brass Monkey hash will be returning to a more normal format!  

•YES we will have group start times!
•YES we will be having circles!
•YES we will have BEER AND MONKEYS!!!
•YES we will have $5 Hash Cash

Buuuuuutttt since Covid isn't 100% gone we're going to have a few changes:

•If covid numbers are up, Hares will lay trail A to A or A to A' - NO CARBACKS.
•Bring a drinking vessel! no more passing monkeys around the circle - and don't put the mouth of the 40 on the rim of your vessel.
•There will be hand sanitizer by the snacks and coolers. USE IT before touching common surfaces.
•Everyone has different comfort levels, if someone wants to keep their distance, or wear a mask, Respect their wishes.
•THE FRB helmet... how the fuck did we ever allow a cootie catcher like that to exist... Not sure





Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=-

 BMH3 #327 – August 6,2022: Hot Ham Wallet and Outside Cat

When:

Saturday, August 6,2022
• Main Pack 3PM show, 3:30PM Go
• Manned Beer Check, probably

Where:

SouthWest corner of the parking lot of 1585 Sawdust Rd, The Woodlands, TX 77380
30.121834281650569, -95.46830490033569
https://goo.gl/maps/iFaL4SGMs2QMak4o8

Hares:

Hot Ham Wallet and Outside Cat

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:
In Celebration of Hot Ham Wallet finishing school, Outside Cat and Hot Ham Wallet are laying a beautiful 2.69 mile trail!
Trail will feature, Shady, Runable Shiggy! Beautiful cool flowing creeks, and VIRGIN TERRITORY!
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!!!!!
FANTASTIC INCREDIBLE, HOLY HELLFIRE SHIT TELL US ABOUT IT MOTHERFUCKER!!!
Outside cat will be making some of her delicious food!

Bring:

WATER, IT IS HOT!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


FROM Twinkle Toes:

WE HAVE SURVIVED!! Since we're all vaccinated(you're vaccinated, right??!) and Covid numbers are going down like your Mom, the Brass Monkey hash will be returning to a more normal format!  

•YES we will have group start times!
•YES we will be having circles!
•YES we will have BEER AND MONKEYS!!!
•YES we will have $5 Hash Cash

Buuuuuutttt since Covid isn't 100% gone we're going to have a few changes:

•If covid numbers are up, Hares will lay trail A to A or A to A' - NO CARBACKS.
•Bring a drinking vessel! no more passing monkeys around the circle - and don't put the mouth of the 40 on the rim of your vessel.
•There will be hand sanitizer by the snacks and coolers. USE IT before touching common surfaces.
•Everyone has different comfort levels, if someone wants to keep their distance, or wear a mask, Respect their wishes.
•THE FRB helmet... how the fuck did we ever allow a cootie catcher like that to exist... Not sure





Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=-