BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 269 - Ivanna 69 Your Bones
When: Saturday, May 16th:
• Do Your Own Trail: 11:00am - 1:69pm
• "OfFiCiAl" Trail: 2:00pm
Where: HEB Parking Lot Near Burger King
https://goo.gl/maps/
3601 Farm to Market Road 1488
The Woodlands, TX 77382
Hares: Ivanna Hairy Buttchug & Indiana Bones and the Temple of Poon
Why: Because you like drinking, period.
Bring: Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Take I-45 N or Hardy Toll Road until it deadends into I-45 to TX-242 W/College Park Drive. Exit there, and turn left at the light for TX-242 W/College Park Drive. Go until it deadends, all of it, the whole way. It will deadend into FM-1488, turn left. After you turn, look for a Burger King next to an HEB, and park at the row facing the street between them. Bam.
Sidenote:
FROM SPORK: I have spoken to these *hares and they have claimed the following: it will be a 4-ish mile trail with a manned beercheck, there are multiple *shallow water crossings, dog friendly, and cannot be run until Saturday after 11am! That’s right, due to Texas and its chance of storms – nay, probability of storms – before or during a monkey event, the hares will not be able to lay trail until Saturday morning. Which brings me to… TRAIL.
Things are a changin’ here in the Lone Star state. Apparently, people have gotten bored with the ‘rona, so it’s back to usual. Because Texas. That being said, we are going to do this in a compromise kind of way, a more use-real-lube-not-spit kinda way. Some people are ready to hash with hashers and some are not, so we’re going to let both do what they want to do. If you would like to do trail alone, start between 11:00am and 1:69pm. Bam. On your own, living your best life. If you want to run the trail en masse, “OfFiCiAl” trail time will be at 2:00pm. If you want to do trail with hashers, show up around that time. A later afternoon one (after 2pm) is not recommended as the chance of rain goes into the afternoon and evening so there is a high probability of trail being gone. Also *.
We will still do virtual circle at 7:00pm, with the link to be posted sometime 30 minutes – 1 hour before on the Brass Monkey FB event. That’s all we’ve got. Make good decisions out there.
*hares are assholes
NOW, READ THIS (UPDATED 05/13/2020):
• The hares will lay the trail on SATURDAY MORNING, so don't do it until after 11:00am. And don't run, you racist piece of shit.
• Trail will be A-to-A.
• There will be no in-person check-in, no hash cash, and no one accountable for you except you.
• If you would like to do the trail on your own, go between 11:00am - 2:00pm.
• If you would like to do the trail with other hashers in a somewhat "organized" way, show up at 2:00pm.
• If you are doing trail, we request you check in on the event page and say, “Hey, I’m doing this shit, hopefully I won’t die, my cell phone number is…” We’re putting some trust in you on this one, which I’m sure we’ll regret, but we are going to give it a shot nonetheless.
• The hares have been instructed that trail “Will need to be simple enough people can do it on their own, but it isn't going to have killer water crossings that someone will face alone, but there must still be shiggy!” Given who the hares are, we’ll hope they don’t fuck that one up.
• Circle will be virtual on Saturday night at 7pm. We will post the link to it on the trail info. In order to attend circle, you need to have a drink in hand and not wearing pants. Okay, that last part is optional, but really, why not?
What’s the worst that could happen? We shall see…
Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
When: Saturday, May 16th:
• Do Your Own Trail: 11:00am - 1:69pm
• "OfFiCiAl" Trail: 2:00pm
Where: HEB Parking Lot Near Burger King
https://goo.gl/maps/
3601 Farm to Market Road 1488
The Woodlands, TX 77382
Hares: Ivanna Hairy Buttchug & Indiana Bones and the Temple of Poon
Why: Because you like drinking, period.
Bring: Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Take I-45 N or Hardy Toll Road until it deadends into I-45 to TX-242 W/College Park Drive. Exit there, and turn left at the light for TX-242 W/College Park Drive. Go until it deadends, all of it, the whole way. It will deadend into FM-1488, turn left. After you turn, look for a Burger King next to an HEB, and park at the row facing the street between them. Bam.
Sidenote:
FROM SPORK: I have spoken to these *hares and they have claimed the following: it will be a 4-ish mile trail with a manned beercheck, there are multiple *shallow water crossings, dog friendly, and cannot be run until Saturday after 11am! That’s right, due to Texas and its chance of storms – nay, probability of storms – before or during a monkey event, the hares will not be able to lay trail until Saturday morning. Which brings me to… TRAIL.
Things are a changin’ here in the Lone Star state. Apparently, people have gotten bored with the ‘rona, so it’s back to usual. Because Texas. That being said, we are going to do this in a compromise kind of way, a more use-real-lube-not-spit kinda way. Some people are ready to hash with hashers and some are not, so we’re going to let both do what they want to do. If you would like to do trail alone, start between 11:00am and 1:69pm. Bam. On your own, living your best life. If you want to run the trail en masse, “OfFiCiAl” trail time will be at 2:00pm. If you want to do trail with hashers, show up around that time. A later afternoon one (after 2pm) is not recommended as the chance of rain goes into the afternoon and evening so there is a high probability of trail being gone. Also *.
We will still do virtual circle at 7:00pm, with the link to be posted sometime 30 minutes – 1 hour before on the Brass Monkey FB event. That’s all we’ve got. Make good decisions out there.
*hares are assholes
NOW, READ THIS (UPDATED 05/13/2020):
• The hares will lay the trail on SATURDAY MORNING, so don't do it until after 11:00am. And don't run, you racist piece of shit.
• Trail will be A-to-A.
• There will be no in-person check-in, no hash cash, and no one accountable for you except you.
• If you would like to do the trail on your own, go between 11:00am - 2:00pm.
• If you would like to do the trail with other hashers in a somewhat "organized" way, show up at 2:00pm.
• If you are doing trail, we request you check in on the event page and say, “Hey, I’m doing this shit, hopefully I won’t die, my cell phone number is…” We’re putting some trust in you on this one, which I’m sure we’ll regret, but we are going to give it a shot nonetheless.
• The hares have been instructed that trail “Will need to be simple enough people can do it on their own, but it isn't going to have killer water crossings that someone will face alone, but there must still be shiggy!” Given who the hares are, we’ll hope they don’t fuck that one up.
• Circle will be virtual on Saturday night at 7pm. We will post the link to it on the trail info. In order to attend circle, you need to have a drink in hand and not wearing pants. Okay, that last part is optional, but really, why not?
What’s the worst that could happen? We shall see…
Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor
Spork
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