BRASS MONKEY H3 # 3

When: Saturday April 2nd, 2011, 3:00pm

Where : Bear Branch Park

5200 Research Forest Dr.

The Woodlands, TX 77381

Hare(s): ESPN & Name My Vagina

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring : $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery: T-shirts $12 (super secret new T-shirts will be there for those that ordered them). Stickers $1, Patches $3, and a thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: From Houston take I-45 North then take exit 77 (Lake Woodlands/Research Forest/Tamine Rd). Go 1.3 miles on feeder and make a left at the first light (Research Forest/Tamina Rd). Go 2.6 miles and Bear Branch Park will be on your right. When you turn into the parking lot we will be meeting in the parking area to the immediate left. If you can't find a spot there is additional parking to the right.

Side Note: This weekend the Houston Spring Campout is taking place. If you can make to that it will be a blast. Spork, ESPN, and I will will not be able to make it out for super lame work related reasons, but those that can go have a Brass Monkey before noon in our honor...ONON.

BRASS MONKEY H3 # 30 "The Dirty 30 Gingervitis Run"

When: Saturday March 19th, 2010, 3:00pm

Where : Old Riley Fuzzel Preserve

(In the parking lot by the Alligator Pond

Hare(s): Ez-2-Please

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring : $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery: T-shirts $12 (Only women's sizes left). Stickers $1, Patches $3, and a thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: From Houston the easiest would be to take the Hardy Toll Road north exit Riley Fuzzel Rd. and make a right once you exit on Riley Fuzzel. Once you cross the bridge you will go .3 miles then you will make a left on Old Riley Fuzzel. This is almost parallel to the road you came in on so you will be heading towards the river. Once you come to the dead end there will be a parking lot on your right.

Side Note: Per Ez: "There will be ONE HUGE KEG OF PREMIUM BEER. 3-6 miles of delicious shiggy to punish the wannabe Warrior Dash. Revenge for the elephant grass from Spork and Donnie's run that left me scarred and unable to wear dresses. Red ginger wigs on trail to feel pretty. Premium beer prizes for the following: Creepiest Ginger Kid, Coolest looking warrior (better if you are Irish or kilted), Guessing ESPN's age. I reserve the right to make you cry like little girls. Wear green, wear orange, whatever you do, don't be ginger."

BRASS MONKEY H3 # 29 "Mardi Gras Hash"

When: Saturday March 5th, 2010, 2:00pm

Where : Puke and Tiny Bubble's House

951 Holiday Drive
Crystal Beach (Bolivar Peninsula), TX 77650

Hare(s): Horse Fli Drive Bi

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring : $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery: T-shirts $12 (Only women's sizes left). Stickers $1, Patches $3, and a thirst for beer of course. Also bring a couple extra dollars to chip in on some food (burgers) or bring your own food.

D'erections: There are two ways to get there Puke let me know it might be quicker to take I-10 to the Winnie (a town not a person) then take TX-124 through High Island and come in the back way. If not the standard way is via Galveston then you will have take the Port Bolivar-Galveston Ferry (http://www.houstontranstar.org/ferrywaittimes/ ) across. My suggestion is to google it.

Side Note: Per Puke: Looking at a start After the Parade,  Campout in yard or on beach in Emerald One, possible Hare...Horse fli drive bi...(Please e-mail me)..few have indicted they are coming Friday.evening...Bring tent...good cajun music at coconuts and Tiki..I'll bring two tents and cots have screened in under porch and will have a keg, (your input) I don't drink much beer any more, (calories) 5 dollar for beer..food is group decision and pot luck is suggested, a dish to share. The Mardi Gras parade will be starting at 11:30am and there will be a group of hashers watching it so come down early is f you can.

BRASS MONKEY H3 # 28

When: Saturday February 19th, 2010, 3:00pm

Where: CSI's House

8818 Rowan Lane

Houston, TX 77036

Hare(s): CSI & Twinkle Toes

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery: T-shirts $12 (Only women's sizes left). Stickers $1, Patches $3, and a thirst for beer of course

D'erections: From the north go south on I-45 take exit 60b and go west on Sam Houston Pkwy/Beltway 8 you are going to go all the way past I-10 and exit Bellaire. Turn left under the Beltway towards 59. Pass two stop lights and turn right on Pella (directly across the street from St. Agnes private school and if you hit the Fiesta on Gessner you've gone to far). Turn left at the second stop sign which will be Rowan lane. Casa de CSI will be about 2/3 a way down the street on the left.

Side Note: The Ononon will be put on by our gracious host CSI there will be food, beer pong table, hot tub, and crash space so please RSVP if you can so we can get a good count. Thanks

BRASS MONKEY H3 "1ST ANALVERSARY" PUB CRAWL

BRASS MONKEY H3 # 27 "1ST ANALVERSARY" PUB CRAWL

When: Saturday February 5th, 2010, 4:00pm

Where: The Gingerman

5607 Morningside Dr

Houston, TX 77005

Hare(s): Donnie The Retard & Mud In My Crick

Why: Because you like drinking period.

Bring: $3 that will go directly towards down down beer at the bar we will be circling at, comfortable shoes, and monkey attire is strongly encouraged.

D'erections: Here's the google maps link The Gingerman

Side Note: This is our "1st Analversary" and I would like to thank H4, EatMeH3, GH3, Austin H3, SAH3, and all the other hashes that have supported us through our first the year. The On On On (On-After) will be at the Texas Beer Fest PRE-PARTY which is conveniently located at the start point so any of you that had that event on your agenda should come out a little early and have some beers with the Brass Monkeys.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 26

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 26 "Back To High School" Run

When: Saturday January 22nd, 2010, 2:00pm

Where: HEB shopping center (near MW Cleaners)

10777 Kuykendahl Road

The Woodlands, TX 77382

Hare(s): Charity Fuck & Mud In My Crick

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12 only woman's sizes left), Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: Directions from Downtown Houston . Go North on I-45 take exit 76B (Woodlands Pkwy) and it will merge you onto Woodlands Pkwy. Take Woodlands Pkwy for about 6 miles then make a left on Kuykendahl Rd and the shopping center will be on your immediate right.

Side Note: The theme of this run is "Back To High School" and the hares request that you wear something that represents yourself in High School...Jocks, Nerds, Cheerleader...etc. As always this is obviously not required, but strongly encouraged.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 25

When: Saturday January 8th, 2010, 2:00pm

Where: Spring Acres Preserve\Spring Creek Greenway

23915 Glen Loch Drive

The Woodlands, TX 77380

Hare(s): Donnie The Retard

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12 only woman's sizes left), Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: Directions from Downtown Houston . Go North on I-45 take exit 73 (Rayford Rd/Sawdust). Once you exit go to the light, (Rayford Rd/Sawdust) and turn left. Go straight and Rayford will turn into Grogans Mill Road, then you will make a left on S. Millbend Drive. Follow S. Millbend until it ends and make a right onto Sawdust Road. Follow Sawdust Road until it ends and make a left on Glen Loch Drive. Follow Glen Loch Drive until it dead ends and go ahead an park on either side of the road.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 24

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 24 "Screw Your Holiday, We'll Make Our Own" Hash On December 25th, 2010 5:00pm

When: Saturday December 25th, 2010, 5:00pm

Where: Cocktor Spork's House

28 Painted Sunset

The Woodlands, TX 77380

Hare(s): Mud In My Crick & Cocktor Spork

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, FLASHLIGHT, shag bag (change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12 only woman's sizes left), Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

Side Note: This run is the Brass Monkey's First Ever MOM "Moon Over Monkeys" Hash, our form of the Full Moon Hash. We were going to be doing a Pub Crawl on Xmas eve, but so many of you people out there such as Jews like myself, and non-Jews who don't like their families and want an excuse to not be with them, came out of the woodwork requesting a Hash on Xmas, so we felt we had to do it! It might possibly be a live hare, which would also be a first. Not sure yet, we'll see. Make sure to bring a FLASHLIGHT because they will not be provided. Also, bring stuff to bundle up in case its nippily.

D'erections: Directions from Downtown Houston . Go North on I-45 take exit 73 (Rayford Rd/Sawdust). Once you exit go to the light, Rayford Rd/Sawdust, and turn left. Go to your 3^rd light, Sawdust Road , and turn left. After you turn, go past your 1^st light and go to the 2^nd, Sawmill Road . Turn left on Sawmill Road . Stay in your left lane and turn left into your 1^st subdivision, Sunset Springs; the name of the street itself is actually Dreamweaver Circle . Pass the very first street that you see on your left and Spork's house is on the corner of the next street, Painted Sunset. If you go just past Painted Sunset, you can park in either the 1^st driveway on your right, which is Donnie The Retard's, or the 1^st driveway on the left, which is Spork's.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 23

"Chrismakkah Hash" On December 11th, 2010 2:00pm

When: Saturday December 11th, 2010, 2:00pm

Where: Papa's Ice House
314 Pruitt Road
Spring, TX 77380

Hare(s): Donnie The Retard

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12 only woman's sizes left), Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

Side Note This run is the Brass Monkey's first ever Chrismakkah Hash honoring the holiday filled month of December. At circle we will be having a "Steal or Keep" gift exchange for those who would like to participate. For the gifts something alcohol related would be awesome, but feel free to bring whatever you would like. The cap will be 10 dollars or less. Participation is obviously not required, but strongly encouraged.

D'erections: Directions from Downtown Houston. Go North on I-45 take exit 73 (Rayford Rd/Sawdust). Once you exit onto the feeder stay to the left and do a U-turn underneath the freeway onto the feeder going south. Once on the southbound feeder stay right and make a right turn onto Pruitt (Pruitt is your second right with a Texaco station on the corner). Papa's will be on your right just past the strip mall.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 22

"La Mud in My Vagina Birthday Spork Run" On November 27th, 2010 2:00pm

When: Saturday November 27th, 2010, 2:00pm

Where: Walmart Supercenter
3040 College Park Dr
The Woodlands, TX 77384

Hare(s): Mud In My Crick, Name My Vagina, La Situación, and Cocktor Spork

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12 (only woman's sizes left), Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

Side Note Name My Vagina and La Situación are celebrating there birthday's this weekend and it's almost Mud in my Cricks birthday plus its La Situación's virgin hare. Don't forget Spork who serving as the Jewish liaison to make certain the trail is Kosher. It is only a suggestion, but I think they should be showered with cheap bottles of booze (Boone's Farm, Mad Dog, Manischewitz Kosher Wine) from which we will make them drink during circle. Again only a suggestion. MUHAHAHA!!!

D'erections: Directions from Downtown Houston. Go North on I-45 take exit 79 (TX 242/College Park Drive/Needham Rd). Make a left at the light onto College Park Dr/TX 242 and Walmart will be in the large shopping center on your immediate right.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 21

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 21 On November 13th, 2010 2:00pm

When: Saturday November 13th, 2010, 2:00pm

Where: Canoe Launch Parking lot in Creekside subdivision
The Woodlands, TX 77380

Hare(s): Dr. Stinkfinger

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12 (only woman's sizes left), Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: Directions from Downtown Houston. Go North on I-45 take exit 76 B (Woodlands Pkwy) keeping going on Woodlands parkway for approx. 3.75 miles then make a left at Gosling Road. You go approx. 1.70 miles then make a right onto Creekside Forrest Drive (it will be the first right after you crossover Spring Creek). Look for a "Canoe Launch" sign on your right and follow the dirt road to the parking area. If you hit the traffic circle in the Creekside subdivision you have gone to far.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 20

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 20 On October 30th, 2010 "Halloween Hash" 3:00pm

When: Saturday October 30th, 2010, 3:00pm

Where: Alden Bridge Sports Field
(Just before Green Bridge Dr on FM 242/College Park Drive)
WARNING: if you Google the address of the park it will provide you with incorrect directions. I have provided correct directions below.

Hare(s): Naughty Ice Box & Stickee Cheeks

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12 (only woman's sizes left), Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

Side Note: This is a Halloween Hash so come dressed appropriately in your finest hash friendly costume. Naughty Ice Box told me there will be multiple beer stops and a prizes the top two costumes.

D'erections: Directions from Downtown Houston. Go North on I-45 take exit 79 (TX-242/College Park Dr/Needham Rd) then make a left onto TX-242 E/Needham Rd and go about 3 miles. Then make a U-Turn at Green Bridge Dr and the park will be on your right.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 19

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 19 On October 16th, 2010 time 3:00pm

When: Saturday October 16th, 2010, 3:00pm

Where: Tailgators Pub & Grill
8000 Highway 242 # 125
Conroe, TX 77385-4358

Hare(s): Donnie The Retard & Cocktor Spork

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12 (only woman's sizes left), Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: Directions from Downtown Houston. Go North on I-45 take exit 79 (TX-242/College Park Dr/Needham Rd) then make a right onto TX-242 E/Needham Rd and Tailgators will be in the strip mall on your immediate right.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 18 "CrabMonkey" Hash

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 18 "CrabMonkey" Hash ON October 2nd, 2010 time :TBA

When: Saturday October 2nd, 2010, time: TBA

Where: Texas Crab Hash

Hare(s): Donnie The Retard, Dick The Boy Wonder, Cocktor Spork

Why: Because you like drinking period.

Bring: Your Ass

D'erections: Go to Texas Crab Hash

Side Note: If you haven't signed up for Texas Crab Hash you are lame, but there's still time and here is the link. http://www.texascrabhash.com/

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 17

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 17 ON September 18th, 2010 4:00pm

When: Saturday September 18th, 2010, 4:00pm.

Where: Former Woodlands Athletic Club
11111 Winterberry Place
The Woodlands, TX 77380

Hare(s): Twinkle Toes & Just Ryan

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12 (only woman's sizes left), Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: From downtown head North on I-45 take exit 73 (Rayford Rd/Sawdust Rd). Make a left at the light onto Rayford Rd/Sawdust Rd. Go about 2 miles (note: this road will turn into Grogans Mill Road after about a mile) then make a left on S. Millbend Drive. Take that just under a quarter mile and make a right on Winterberry Place the former Woodlands Athletic Club will be on your left.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 16

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 16

When: Saturday September 4th, 2010, 5:00pm.

Where: Sundance Park
3700 West Alden Bridge Drive
The Woodlands, TX 77382

Hare(s): Dr. Stink Finger

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12 (only women's sizes left), Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: From downtown head North on I-45 take exit 77 (Lake Woodlands/Research Forrest Dr/Tamina Dr). Stay on the feeder for just over a mile and make a left at the Research Forrest Dr/Tamina Road stop light. This will take you underneath the freeway follow Research Forrest all the way until it ends (6.5 miles or so) and then turns into Branch Crossing Dr . Once research ends the road will go left and then you are on Branch Crossing Dr. Go about a a half mile and make a right on Alden Bridge Dr. The park will be on your right.

Sidenote: There might possible be a pool for after circle so bring your bathing suit.

Updated: BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 15

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 15 ON August 21th, 2010 4:00pm

When: Saturday August 21th, 2010, 4:00pm.

Where: FM 1488 and Corporate Wood Dr (At the end Corporate Wood where it dead ends)

Hare(s): Little Pussy

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12 (only women's sizes left), Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: From downtown head North on I-45 take exit 81 (FM 1488) go just under 10 miles and Corporate Wood Drive will be on your right hand side. Make a right onto Corporate Wood Drive then follow it until it dead ends and park there. If you hit Superior Road/Crestview Blvd you have gone about a half mile too far.

Sidenote: Little pussy will be providing a turkey/eagle split so this should be pure shiggy.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 14

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 14 "The Lamest Pub Crawl Ever" ON August 7th, 2010 5:00pm

When: Saturday August 7th, 2010, 5:00pm.

Where: Chuy's (In the Bar)
18035 Interstate 45
Shenandoah, TX 77385-8717
(936) 321-4440

Hare(s): Donnie The Retard

Why: Because you like drinking period.

Bring: Money for drinks at each of the stops...yes there will be more than one so I guess the pub crawl isn't completely lame.

D'erections: From downtown head North on I-45 take exit 77 (Lake Woodlands Dr/Research Forrest Dr/Tamina exit) stay on the feeder for 2.4 miles and Chuy's will be on your right. It is past Research Forrest/Tamina Rd and if you hit FM 242 you've gone to far.

Sidenote: We will provide some down down beer at the end for circle so there is no hash cash just bring money for your drink of choice at each bar. Because I am awesome and I felt like living up to my name I completely failed to provide a real trail for this weekend; however the Brass Monkey every other Saturday tradition must be kept alive so I give you "The Lamest Pub Crawl Ever".

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 13

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 13 ON July 24th, 2010 3:00pm

When: Saturday July 24th, 2010, 3:00pm.

Where: Cocktor Spork's House (Across the street from Donnie and ESPN's house)
28 Painted Sunset
The Woodlands, TX 77380

Hare(s): ESPN and Donnie The Retard

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too!!!

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12 (only women's sizes left), Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: From downtown head North on I-45 take exit 73 (Rayford/Sawdust) go left at the light which will take you underneath the freeway go straight for less than a mile then make a left onto Sawdust Road (3rd stop light). Follow Sawdust Road for less then a mile and make a Left on Sawmill Road (2nd stop light). Not the first opening, but the second opening in the center island/divider make a Left onto Dreamweaver Circle. Spork's house will be down on the left at the corner of Painted Sunset and Dreamweaver Circle.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 12 BMH3 / EATMEH3

"Yard Ralph's Birthday Run" ON July 10th, 2010 5:00pm

When: Saturday July 10th, 2010, 5:00pm.

Where:Rocky Creek Park \ Campground (Lake Somerville)
Park is at the intersection of FM 1948 and Rocky Creek Park Road
Burton, TX 77835

Hare(s): Yard Ralph

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too!!!

Bring: BYOB...$2 to get into park campground, $10 for a campsite if you choose to stay the night, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: This the link to the intersection where the Park\Campground is http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=Rocky+Creek+Road+and+FM+1948&sll=30.298204,-96.550598&sspn=0.176968,0.362892&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=Farm+to+Market+Road+1948+%26+Rocky+Creek+Park+Rd,+Burton,+Washington,+Texas+77835&z=16

SPECIAL SIDE NOTE If you want to come to this it would be best to RSVP because their will be food at the end and a head count is needed. Also if you would like to camp on Friday or Saturday contact me and I will let Yard Ralph know so she can reserve more campsites.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 11 "Superheroes"

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 11 "Superheroes" ON June 26th, 2010 5:00pm

When: Saturday June 26th, 2010, 5:00pm.(new start time)

Where: Creekwood Park
3833 South Panther Creek Drive
The Woodlands, TX 77381

Hare(s): Naughty Ice Box

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too!!!

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: From downtown take I-45 North to exit 76B (Woodlands Pkwy). The ramp will merge you onto Woodlands Pkwy go 3 miles and you will make a left on S. Panther Creek Dr. The park will be half a mile down the road on the left.

SPECIAL SIDE NOTE This is Naughty Ice Box's virgin hare so lets all come out and have a great time. Because the Brass Monkey's love their themed runs Naughty Ice Box requests that everyone should come sporting your favorite "Superhero" attire.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 10

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 10 "SPORK'S BALLS OF FURY RUN" ON June 12, 2010 3:00pm

When: Saturday June12, 2010, 3:00pm.

Where: Kroger
6616 Fm 1488 Rd
Magnolia, TX 77354

Hare(s): Cocktor Spork

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too!!!

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: Coming from downtown go north on I-45 to exit 81 (FM 1488). Go west on 1488 for 2.7 miles and the Kroger will be on your right.

SPECIAL SIDE NOTE: This run will be celebrating the start of the World Cup which begins on Friday, June 11th. Wear Soccer Socks, Goalie Gloves, a Cup to protect your Balls Of Fury, your Favorite Teams Jersey/Shirt, or whatever else you can think of Soccer Related. BE CREATIVE PEOPLE! 

We will be gathering at the 7 Leagues Mexican Restaurant before the Hash to watch USA vs. England at 1:30 CST. You will pass this restaurant (it will be on your right) just before you come to the Kroger parking lot, but it has limited parking so parking in the Kroger lot is your best bet. Once the game completes around 3:00 PM, the hash will commence from the Kroger parking lot.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 8 UPDATED!!!

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 8 "ESPN'S RED HEADED SLUT RUN" ON May 15, 2010 3:00pm

When: Saturday May 15, 2010, 3:00pm.

Where: Kroger
2301 Rayford Road
Spring, TX 77386

Hare(s): ESPN

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!!There may be Red Headed Slut jello shots on trail woohoo!!

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Stickers $1), thirst for beer of course.Bring a a few extra dollars for potential extra special beer stops other than the one to two we will provide. Wear a red wig to supper "Red Headed Sluts" across the world.

D'erections: Coming from downtown go north on I-45 to exit 73 (Rayford\Sawdust) and make a right at the light onto Rayford Road. Go 2.1 miles and the Kroger will be on your left hand side.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 7

Zippy Trail at the H4 Campout ON May 1, 2010 3:30pmish

When: Saturday May 1, 2010, 3:30pmish.

Where: H4 camp out (If you want to participate in this trail than sign up for the H4 Spring Campout http://h4.org/mismanagement/mismanagement-2009-10/2010-spring-campout/ )

Hare(s): Donnie The Retard

Why: Because you like drinking.

Bring: Your butt

D'erections: Rego for the H4 Spring Campout already

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 6 "Brass Monkey\Mosquito H3 Special"

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 6 "Brass Monkey\Mosquito H3 Special" ON April 17, 2010 3pm

When: Saturday April 17, 2010, 3pm.

Where: Brown Park
Tomball, TX 77377
It's Near the intersection of Brown Road and 249

Hare(s): Donut Holer

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!! On a side note.

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Patches $3, Stickers $1), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: If you are coming from Downtown go north on I-45. Take exit 60C to merge onto Sam Houston Parkway. Take the Sam Houston Pkwy to Tomball Pkwy\TX 249 N. Go 13 miles and make a left on Brown Road. Then go 1 mile and make a right on Coral Canyon. The park will be about a half mile up on your right.

TXIH Keg War!!!

Will the Brass Monkeys represent the South well?

TXIH PRELUBE

PUBCRAWL PRESENTED BY THE BRASS MONKEY H3

When: Thursday April 8, 2010, 6:30pm.

Where: The 19th Hole Bar & Grill
202 Sawdust Road, Spring, TX 77380
(281) 363-2574‎

Hare(s): Donnie The Retard

Why: Because you want to celebrate the coming of TXIH 2010

Bring: $3 for mist makers and shot stop plus money for what ever drinks you choose along the way.

D'erections: Coming from downtown Houston head north on I-45 exit Rayford/Sawdust (exit 73) make left underneath the freeway and immediately get over to the right lane. Make a right on Borough Park Drive just past the HEB and the bar will be on your left.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 5 "Spork's Easter Egg Hunt"

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 5 "Spork's Easter Egg Hunt" ON April 3, 2010 3pm

When: Saturday April 3, 2010, 3pm.

Where: HEB in the Sterling Ridge/Indian Springs Shopping Center
Corner of Woodlands Parkway and Kuykendahl

10777 Kuykendahl Rd
The Woodlands, TX 77383

Hare(s): Cocktor Spork

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!! On a side note.

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Patches $3, Stickers $1), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: Coming from downtown Houston head north on I-45 exit Woodlands Pkwy (exit 76B) the on ramp dumps off directly onto Woodlands Pkwy. Follow Woodlands Pkwy for approx 5.5 miles until you come to Kuykendahl Rd intersection you will then make a left on Kuykendahl Rd and a quick right into the HEB parking lot.

Notes: There will be some serious Shiggy... Woodlands Shiggy:) There will be water crossings so bring a change of socks and or shoes. Also, SunBlock and Bug Spray are always good to have.

BMH3 #4

When: Saturday March 20, 2010, 3pm.

Where: I-45 Exit 79
The trail will be off of FM 242 east of I-45. D'erections below.

Hare(s): AssGrabber

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!! On a side note AssGrabber has also set a second Kayak and Canoe friendly trail for those interested.

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Patches $3, Stickers $1), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: Coming from downtown go North on I-45 take exit 79 (FM 242/College Park) and go right on FM 242. Once you turn right you will be heading east on 242 pass through Lexington Dr/Needham road intersection and go .5 miles to Lazy River Rd (It looks like an access road). Make a right onto Lazy River Road before you come to a bridge that crosses the San Jacinto River and follow the road until it circles underneath FM 242. Right when you cross under FM 242 there will be a small clearing for parking. If by some chance you end up on the bridge and you are crossing over the San Jacinto River you have gone to far. Sorry there is no addresses but if you have a GPS I can give you Latitude= 30°12'33.68"N and Longitude= 95°24'9.25"W.

Side Note: We just got another order of shirts for all of you that did not get one at BMH3#1 and this run is going to be a wet one so bring a dry change of clothes.

BMH3 #3

When: Saturday March 6, 2010, 3pm.

Where: Bear Branch Park
5200 Research Forest Drive
The Woodlands, TX 77381

Hare(s): ESPN

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!!

Bring: $5, shag bag, $$ for haberdashery (Patches $3, Stickers $1), thirst for beer of course.

Be there or be square MoFos!!!

This page is boring.

I'm bored now.

that funky monkey

BMH3 #2

When: Saturday February 20, 2010, 2pm.

What: BMH3 #2

Where: Walmart Supercenter
1025 Sawdust Rd
Spring/The Woodlands, TX 77380

Hare: Twinkle Toes

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!!

Bring: $5, shag bag, $$ for haberdashery (Brass Monkey H3 Patches $3, Stickers $1), thirst for beer of course. Directions to the on after will be given out at the Hash.

Updated Stats...

14 pounds consumed because espn had a secret stash of carne asada cause she's awesome...ok well it's gone now so 15 pounds...
72 hamburgers....
60 hotdogs
20 veggie burgers
27 bagels
40 kolaches
4 1/2 kegs
20 18 packs of beer
2 cases of forties plus OJ (two 40's exploded because glass doesn't bounce on tile floors)
1 cooler of jello shots / jello penises plus the jello shots my neighbor brought over
3 to 4 gallons of whiskey
1 bucket of margaritas
3.25 liters of tequila
1/2 a bottle of Hot Sex which I found in my freezer and almost made me vomitt
A shit load of taco bell
and a partridge in a pear tree...

I'm sure there's more I am forgetting but all in all it was a blast...glad everyone made it out.

current stats.....as we remember.

On Friday, 15 pounds of Carne asada was devoured by the Brass Monkey.
1 keg was emptied in 6 hours and 58 minutes.
4 people puked. (piggus, 3m, espn, bumper)
1 person remained hungover and non-functional all day. (espn)

Donnie remains quite efeminate!
Net is gone, again....cause he is taking it in the anus again. guess that is what happens when he likes to act like Brownie and go to bed early.

Teacher is mad, and running around the house looking for Net.
Flip cup is so last year. boring. haha
it's beer pong/beirut and full contact ball retrieval.

on on
gaylord focker

BRASS MONKEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ON GOING.
kickball champions of the world are Team A. the Don-Gay-Net association. with a far lesser force of 9 versus the outsiders of that wench Raisin, who had 15 players and still could not match the ferocity of Team superawesome!!!!

brass monkey. "we put the fuck, in fuck yeah!"

on on

Itinerary for Events up to and Including BMH3 #1

Ok people here is the itinerary of the events surrounding the sure to be epic BMH3 #1.

Thursday February 4, 2010

1.    Kimchi’s arriving at IAH at 2:52pm. Spork and I will have 2 vehicles to accommodate everyone

2.    Bob will be renting a car due to his extended stay and will be picking up Hoot (5:30pm Terminal B) and our esteemed mystery guest (4:30pm-ish Terminal C) (if you have not linked up with Bob you should do so now)

3.    Kimchi caravan will make a pit stop at the Liquor Store so you may pickup any necessary booze taking into account there is an already iced down keg of Lone Star awaiting you at the House of Retard (DTR and ESPN’s house…duhhh).

4.    BBQ Mexican Style at the House of Retard if everyone’s down maybe chip in a couple bucks and we will get an assload of Carne Asada, Tortillas, homemade Guacamole and Pico and have a nice little drunken Mexican Style BBQ minus the Chelada.

5.    Beer Pong, Flip cup, The Dreidel…well you get the picture

If you happened to be driving in or are in the area and would like to take part in Thursday’s madness let me know and I will give you my address/directions

Friday February 5, 2010

1.    Wake up and shake off your hangovers (will have bagels and stuff for the morning)

2.    Tentative hung over poker game BFE style.

3.    If we don’t play poker I say we play kickball to get some blood flowing

4.    Do pretty much whatever we want I’m assuming there will be drinking involved

5.    5:00pm leave the House of Retard in a convoy down to Houston. H4 with the help of McPisser has agreed to run a small trail for the Out of Towners who will miss the normal Sunday run. This run will coincide with H4’s regularly scheduled Happy Hour. McPisser said we will either be Meeting at the Happy Hour location or at a bar near by for the trail. Happy Hour usually runs about 3 hours so around 9pm we will be heading out.

6.    Return to the House of Retard which will be converted into the Palatial Palace of Retarded Love with the help of another esteemed mystery guest who fucking rocks….you know who you are.

7.    Music, potential for Karaoke, Beer Pong, Flip cup, The Dreidel…well you get the picture

Again, if you happened to be driving in or are in the area and would like to take part in Friday’s madness let me know and I will give you my address/directions and you are welcome to crash

Saturday February 6, 2010…dun dun dun

1.    The day we have all been waiting for will be upon us

2.    Wake up and shake off your hangovers (will have bagels and stuff for the morning)

3.    2:00pm Brass Monkey H3 #1 beginning at the Ranch Hill Saloon (for details see http://teambrassmonkey.blogspot.com/ or http://www.hashspace.com/group/brassmonkeyh3 )

4.    On after at the Palatial Palace of Retarded Love will have burgers, hot dogs, and snacky cakes along with beer of course.

5.    Entertainment provided by an esteemed pretty pretty princess

6.    Party until your liver falls out…that is if you still have one that functions.

Sunday February 7, 2010

1.    Wake Up will have Bagels and Kolaches

2.    Take Kimchis and Hoot to the Airport we will leave at 10:00am…should give you guys plenty of time to make your 12:00 noon flights (takes 20 minutes to get to the Airport)

3.    Those of you who are not flying out are welcome to stay for the Super Bowl. H4 will also be having their annual pooper bowl run (for details http://h4.org/calendar/ )

4.    Clean up, watch the Super Bowl get drunk…again

5.    I have Monday off so if you need/want to crash an extra night you are more than welcome, but come Monday you don’t have to go home but you got to get the Fuck outta my House, smooches!!!!

Key notes

1.    There should be plenty of floor, couch, and beds for everyone. I will have some sleeping gear for people; however I would suggest bringing what ever you need just in case (air mattress, sleeping bag, pillow…etc)

2.    Bring a towel for showering purposes if you are crashing.

3.    Standard Hash attire should suffice for the weekend…nothing fancy going on here…we will be drinking Lone Star all weekend enough said.

4.    Again, if you are coming in from out of town and you want to come over/crash before Saturday just let me know by responding to this email.

WE PUT THE “FUCK” IN “FUCK YEAH” – BMH3

Love,

DTR

Behold!!!!

The wrath of "The Dreidel" shall reign down upon you!!! MUHAHAHAHA!!!!

It shall be unleashed BMH3 weekend...hell it we'll probably have to test it out before that, but you mofos best be ready!!!

Updated Start Info!!!

When: Saturday February 6, 2010, 2pm.

Where: Ranch Hill Saloon
24704 Interstate 45 # 103
Spring, TX 77386-1928
(281) 298-9035

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!!

Bring: $5, shag bag, $$ for haberdashery (Brass Monkey H3 shirts available $12, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course, sleeping bag or something to sleep on if you are crashing. Directions to the on after will be given out at the Hash.

Local Hotels

If there is anyone that would prefer staying at a hotel their are several less than 2 miles away from my house where the on after will be.

1. Holiday In Express: http://maps.google.com/maps/place?cid=8861345849560243450&q=Hotels&hl=en&cd=1&cad=src:pplink&ei=KHdQS625No60yQTouezWBA

The rate for that weekend will be $99.00

2. La Quinta: http://maps.google.com/maps/place?cid=12596933133610949954&q=Hotels&hl=en&cd=2&cad=src:pplink&ei=KHdQS625No60yQTouezWBA

The rate for that weekend will be between $89.00 - $99.00

3. Extended Stay America: http://maps.google.com/maps/place?cid=11715806270794029498&q=Hotels&hl=en&cd=3&cad=src:pplink&ei=KHdQS625No60yQTouezWBA

The rate for that weekend will be $64.99

4. Super 8: http://maps.google.com/maps/place?cid=8783593165360668907&q=Hotels&hl=en&cd=5&cad=src:pplink&ei=KHdQS625No60yQTouezWBA

The rate for that weekend will be $65.00

Again there is plenty of floor/couch space, but if you would prefer something to yourself feel free to book a room and we can organize transportation to and from the hotels.

Hash groups in Attendance!

So far it seems that there is quite the regal gathering gonna occur in The Woodlands of Texas. Seems mystical...but here we go, in no particular order: Kimchi H3, Knuckledraggers H3, aCHUMP H3, Koustin H3, Austin H3, San Antonio H3 and still waiting to hear if those retards in the valley will be sending a contingency. (The ICBINMH3)

This message was brought to you by: Chelada, aCHUMP H3, and more cheladas.

Brass Monkey H3 #1

What: BMH3 #1
When: Feb. 6th 2010 2pm
Where: TBD
Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!!
Bring:$5, shag bag, $$ for haberdashery (Brass Monkey H3 shirts available $12, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course, sleeping bag or something to sleep on if you are crashing


This is all the info we have so far, but I do know there is a contingency of out of towners coming in to support this awesome event on Thursday. So, in actuality the party really starts Thursday with the forecast showing Karaoke and a visit to H4 Thirsty Thursday. Friday will most likely have other Drunken activities taking place I'm sure. Then Saturday will be upon us and the dream that is the BMH3 will be realized. The on after will be at my and ESPN's house with a side venue located directly across the street (Spork's house, yes that is my brother and yes we live across the street from each other). There should be plenty of crash space between the houses and if you can't find a couch or a bed (other than my own) grab some floor. A sleeping bag would probably be a good idea, but regardless everyone is welcome. Plenty more info to cum.

Lakers vs. Heat

Last night while I was watching the Lakers vs. Heat and Stu Lance, one of my favorite announcers, was making a comment about the Lakers young center Andrew Bynum. As Bynum was setting a pick Stu called him "The Great Wall of Bynum"...it's not nearly as funny now as it was live, but Bynum proceeded to have his best game of the season. The kid definitely has talent but as of late his defense has been suspect. That worries me a bit because that what he's in there for; blocking shots and rebounding scoring is just a bonus. Regardless the Lakers won so that's all that matters. Tomorrow they play the Rockets and I will be there live rollin deep with a Lakers contingency. Why can't it be Thursday already for the love of all that is good and holy, damn you Tex Mex!!!!

Happy New Year!

This may be one of the funniest pictures of my drinking career!!!

Read the name tag...that's right my sister got me a shirt that says hello my name is ninja. But I think the Do-rag and the Manischewitz really complete the look.

TXIH 2008

As any good Kimchi I felt the need to saturate hashers with stupid catch phrases. The all time favorite "Fuck yeah!!!" was a crowd pleaser as usual, but "No Roger you tiger, now" seemed to be the favorite for the weekend. ESPN and Gaylord should be posting pictures shortly.

The Lakers Kick ASS!!!!

Kobe drops 52 and The Lakers beat Dallas 104-108 in overtime. Who's the best team in the League? Say it for me one time...The Los Angeles Lakers.

Prediction: Brownie will state something along the lines that I am delusional; however the facts are the facts and Denver is currently holding the 9th spot in the west. FYI only the top 8 get into the post season.

Side Bet: Brownie, I will bet one 40 oz of the Malt liquor of your choosing that the Denver Nuggets will not make the playoffs.

Fuck Yeah!!!

Well it looks like ESPN and I are going to try to plan a trip to Europe next year. I've only spent a little time in Germany so I'm pretty excited. ESPN and I were discussing the details yesterday when I came up with a goal for this particular trip should we actually take it. My goal is to learn how to say "Fuck Yeah" in every country we go to. I know it sounds goofy, but it will a good time fo shizzle!!!

Anything and Everything

If you haven’t seen NBN’s blog then you don’t know the Lakers made a huge move and picked up Pau Gasol an All Star caliber big man in exchange for Kwame “stone hands” Brown, Javaris Crittenton, and some draft picks. If everyone gets back healthy I think there’s a good chance the purple and gold could go all the way this season and they’re so young that they’ll be contending for a while. Derek Fisher is the only player on the roster over 30 even the newly acquired Gasol is only 27. It’s looking pretty naughty in Lakerland

On another note I finally got to ride my bike on Saturday (It had been 10 days) and had a nice ride until I almost rear ended some dude because he slammed on his brakes to turn with out signaling. I was coming down this road called FM 1488 going about 45. There was construction all over the place and the road was covered with gravel/dirt/mud. I had a good cushion between the guy ahead and I, but when he stopped I hit the brakes and my back tire locked up most likely because of the debris on the road. Then the back end of the bike swung to the left a little because I was in a slight turn. I straightened up and rode the brake until I stopped. It was a little scary, but it was good experience learning wise and something they taught us during the safety course I took. I had to pull off the road for a second and collect myself because that was my first experience like that being that I've only had the bike for a month and a half.

I have to say the Super bowl was a very good game and it's always nice to get hammered and hang out with friends and my crazy family. Even though I was rooting for the Patriots and a possible perfect season I am happy for Eli Manning. I bet it feels good to step out of big bro's shadow. Man, I know that was a great win and the Giants played a good game, but god damn they are beating a dead horse with this story on ESPN (not my wife the TV channel) they just keep saying the same thing over and over and over. The super bowl was great, but I'm sure there was other sports news. I will give a warning to all those drinkers out there that hooters wings are like crack after a long night of drinking, you eat one then keep coming back. I ate way too many wings last night and this morning I felt like a steaming pile of cow dung. Booze was the main cause, but my stomach told me the wings did not help things. Until next time Biatches!!!!

It's been a while....

It's been a while since ESPN and I have worked out on a regular basis and last night we started a new gym. It's more of a martial arts gym but the have all kinds off classes like Brazilian Ju-Jitsu, Kickboxing, Boxing, and Fight fit classes (circuit training). We did the circuit training class yesterday and my chubby ass almost could get out of bed because of how sore I was, but it's a great feeling now if it would only stop raining I could ride my bike and all would be right with the universe.
On another note BFE is less than 6 months away we should probably start planning soon and bombard Lip-Lock-Me with annoying emails!!! Until next time biatches!!!

And The Crowd Goes Silent!!!

In the midst of the Lakers longest winning streak in 4 years the Lakers 20 year old center Andrew Bynum goes down with a knee injury. Much of the Lakers recent success has been attributed to Bynum's elevated play. He's been a Monster in the middle averaging a double double (13.1 points, 10.2 rebounds). On Sunday versus the Memphis Grizzlies Bynum was going up for a rebound and landed on Lamar Odom's foot twisting his knee on the way down. Today, it was released that he will be out for at least 8 weeks. That leaves Kwame Brown in the middle and the Lakers without there second biggest threat. This could not have come at a worse time considering the Lakers have long road trip coming up and their next 3 games are against the top three teams in the west Phoenix, San Antonio, and Dallas. If they can keep some of the momentum they have and get through the next stretch they should be alright, but it's going to be tough. Bynum get well soon, please!!!!

Sport Betting

I heard something funny on the radio today about gambling on sports. I was listening to the Mike Tirico Show on Espn radio. A guy name Erik Kuselias was filling in for him and they were discussing why he suggested to a friend why they should pick West Virginia to beat Oklahoma. Apparently some of Erik's friends were wondering who they might pick because they hadn't heard any specifics on that particular game. Then he goes into this description about “the secretary rule”. Basically, if you are ever involved in a betting pool at work and you want to know who’s going to win break into the office of the person who is running the pool and look to see who all the secretaries picked then pick the opposite. He went on to say “If there were a pool about the West Virginia/Oklahoma game every secretary and their mother would have picked Oklahoma because it was too easy”. He told his friends to take West Virginia and obviously it worked out, but it’s still pretty funny.

Lakers....Master List...etc...

Just 4 weeks until we throw down at TEX MEX. What that means is it's time to start getting the Master List together. I will post something on the Tex Mex blog to get the List started.

I know it’s been a while since my last post, but better late than never. I was strictly instructed this morning by a large Columbian gentleman to "update my fucking blog already". Might I add this large Columbian gentleman is the gayest person I know and likes to smear feces on his face and dance naked in his garage.

Moving on the Lakers have turned out to be a pleasant surprise and if they continue to play this way they are a Shawn Marion away from being a true contender. With the new found confidence of youngsters like Jordan Farmar and Andrew Bynum they look like they might be able to make a little run this year. Even Sasha Vujacic has been a surprise this year, maybe that's because he actually started make the shots he’s taking, nevertheless I am impressed and I hope he keeps it up.

Today I am going to by my first motorcycle I am pretty excited. It's a nice custom bike made by Yamaha. Yesterday my co-workers decorated my office for my birthday. It was pretty damn funny and Nick would have especially gotten a kick out of the theme...

Brown table covers,Toilet paper, toilet paper seats, and then there's my window of poop and they even went so far as to rub brown candy on the toilet seats to look like poop. It was kind of disturbing, but damn funny.

Shit Or Get Off The Pot!!!!

As we all know it looks as if there is a good chance that one of the great players of my time will no longer wear a Lakers uniform. As die hard Lakers fan the emotional roller coaster that is the Lakers is becoming incessantly unnerving. I obviously don’t want Kobe to go, but if he is leaving I wish they could just get it done and get him out of here so the Lakers and Lakers fans can get on with their lives and continue to watch Jerry Buss and his family run the Lakers into the ground. If Kobe goes the only upside will be the possibility of a Lottery pick in some up and coming draft. There were so many possible changes the Lakers could have made to appease the situation, but instead the Lakers ownership did nothing. Kobe is by no means perfect, but he wants to win and obvious that is not a priority to the Lakers right now. Kobe was supposedly told by Mitch Kupchak and Jerry Buss that they were committed to building a team capable of a championship around him, but any fan can look at the roster right now and know that isn’t the case. Where’s Jerry West when you need him?