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Tuesday, March 12, 2024

The Green Dress Run and an Analversary for 69!!!

 



 

 

****Lots of hare dates open!!  SIGN UP NOW!
https://teambrassmonkey.blogspot.com/2023/11/2024-hare-signups.html

 

BMH3 #369 – 3/16/2024: The Green Dress Run and an Analversary for 69!!!


When:

Saturday, March Sixteenth TwentyTwentyfour
• Main Pack 2PM show, 2:30PM Go
• Manned Beer Check!

Where:

That parking lot at the dead end of old riley fuzzel rd
1307 Riley Fuzzell Rd, Spring, TX 77386

30.09337215624741, -95.40564508348992

Hares:

Cocktor Spork - KatchUp - Twinkle Toes? 

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:

It's finally time for all of us to go nose-diving together into that glorious cusp of the V that is our legs. This amazing trail is hared by three hares with plenty of great shiggy trails under their belt, so expect some damn good shiggy. We are looking at a nice and easy 4-6 mile trail with the potential for two beer checks. The weather leading up to and on the day of is looking a bit wet; if that is the case, we could be looking at an adventure float down Spring Creek. Make sure to bring some kind of flotation device in the event we get to float. We will have a dog-friendly trail, but unfortunately, no floating for your furry friends unless you want them to

Song from the Hares:

(Melody - 369 Cupid ft. B.O.B)

Three, six, nine the Monkey drank wine

The monkey smoked the dope on the street car line 

And the line broke and the monkey got chocked

And they all went to heaven in a lil' inflatable float ((clap, clap))

Ladies and gentlemen I'm about to make you feel alright

I've got the beat to move your feet plus I know just what you like,

Rough shiggy ahead, in your sight

Let's make another monkey and drink all night



Bring:

WATER, IT IS starting to warmup!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:

FROM HOUSTON: Dont go in the neighborhood, from holzworth, drive down the dirt road until you see the parking lot.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=-

Wednesday, February 28, 2024

BMH3 #368 – 3/2/2024: Womb Raiders birthday!


 

 

****Lots of hare dates open!!  SIGN UP NOW!
https://teambrassmonkey.blogspot.com/2023/11/2024-hare-signups.html

 

BMH3 #368 – 3/2/2024: Womb Raiders birthday!


When:

Saturday, March Second TwentyTwentyfour
• Main Pack 2PM show, 2:30PM Go
• Manned Beer Check!

Where:

Parking-Lake at Springwoods Village Nature Preserve
Trailhead by Exxon
24000 Holzwarth Rd, Spring, TX 77389
https://maps.app.goo.gl/nBxp2KwcN1FAvQ1D7
30.1029838112169, -95.45661527414569

Hares:

Womb Raider

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:

Trail will be between 3-4 miles with plenty of shiggy and thorns. It is finally warm enough to get y’all wet so expect water crossings. There will be one manned beer check with tasty selections of beverages and one unmanned shot check (no guarantees shots will be tasty as Dresses with Wolves picked it out based solely on the coolness of the label). For circle I will be baking something (or let’s be honest more likely buying something) Birthday Cake like. Looking forward to punishing y’all with a great/shitty trail in honor of another year of survival and drinking for it!


Bring:

WATER, IT IS starting to warmup!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:

FROM HOUSTON: Dont go in the neighborhood, from holzworth, drive down the dirt road until you see the parking lot.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=-

Monday, February 12, 2024

BMH3 #367 – 2/17/2024: TWINKLE TOES 40th birthday!! and Brass Monkey 14th anniversary CAMPOUT!

 


****We need Hares in March and April!!  SIGN UP NOW!
https://teambrassmonkey.blogspot.com/2023/11/2024-hare-signups.html

 

BMH3 #367 – 2/17/2024: TWINKLE TOES 40th birthday!! and Brass Monkey 14th anniversary CAMPOUT!


When:

Saturday, February Seventeenth, TwoThousandandTwentyFour
•Camping: Anytime you want, I suggest early enough to setup camp before trail
• Trail: Main Pack NOON show, NOON:30PM Go
• Manned Beer Check!

Where:

TRAIL:
Double Lake Hunter camp on NFSR 220
Forest Service Rd 220, Coldspring, TX 77331
30.5331790344169, -95.13466434168369
https://maps.app.goo.gl/sL1SAkKX35KajKNB7

Camping:Go read the Notes from the Hares!

Hare:

TWINKLE TOES!!!!!!!

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:
TRAIL:  Trail will gather at NOON, Pack off at NOON:30! Trail will be 4 to 6 miles of glorious Sam Houston National Forest shiggy.  I mean this area is just some of the best shiggy I have had the pleasure to scout and lay in a looooong time.  Expect serious shiggy, if necessary, you will be able to bail at the beer checks.  I highly recommend Shiggy Socks/pants, long sleeves,and bug spray, I found a tick on me afterwards.

CAMPING: For the on after, we will be CAMPING!!!!! After circle beer runs out and hash snacks are gone, you're on your own! Bring Your Own EVERYTHING! You'll need to take care of yourself until you can pack up and leave sunday morning.
I highly recommend arriving a bit before trail and setting up your camp before trail. You can come as early as you want, even Friday!
These campsites are primitive, as in bring a poop shovel primitive!

With the weather being a little soggy in the days beforehand, we have two options for campsite:
30.5331790344169, -95.13466434168369    The Start location campsite, it's nicer, but tends to become a bit muddy, so if it's too muddy, or crowded, we'll go to option B

Option B will just be a little farther down NFSR 220: 30.539560125179769, -95.1290570960769  It's closer to the road, but less pooling water, If we camp here we'll do CarFronts to the start of trail.

I'll post and park my Jeep at whichever site I think we should use, but really whoever sets up tents first gets it.


Bring:

WATER, you're camping and running, you'll get thirsty!
FOOD you have to feed yourself dinner, and maybe breakfast depending how fast you leave Sunday.
BOOZE, circle beer won't last all night
FIREWOOD
SHELTER
POOPSHOVEL!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail and camping on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=-

Saturday, January 27, 2024

BMH3 #366 – 02/03/2024: 4get-me-nutz & Its A GOAT Throat

 


****The rest of 2024 Trail signups are now available!  SIGN UP NOW!
https://teambrassmonkey.blogspot.com/2023/11/2024-hare-signups.html




BMH3 #366 – 02/03/2024: 4get-me-nutz & Its A GOAT Throat


When:

Saturday, February Third, TwoThousand and Twenty Four
• Main Pack 2PM show, 2:30PM Go

Where:

South end Cul De Sac of Mesa Dr, Humble, TX 77396
https://maps.app.goo.gl/cWm7bPNwvEEAy8WH8
29.92454993098769, -95.28004306775469

Hares:

4get-me-nutz & Its A GOAT Throat

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:
Trail will by A-to-A prime!!! Length 3.69 miles
Info: A mix of shiggy and NE Houston splendor! Lots of rough terrain, one section with scrambling up/down a hill, a BVC water crossing over a plank bridge, multiple instances of trespassing (j/k.. unless?), yeah folks we got it all! Should be dog friendly, but walkers need to be ready for difficult terrain, walking over broken glass/boards-with-nails, etc. Because of recent rain, there will likely be plenty of standing water and sogginess on trail. Plan accordingly!


Bring:

WATER, IT IS HOT!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:

Turns out Nutz likes you and gave me directions to pass along!
Going eastbound on BW8 North loop, take Mesa Dr exit (first exist after 59, last free exit), turn right onto Mesa Dr and drive into the Fall Creek subdivision. Go past two pools and over a bridge and you’ll reach southern termination point of Mesa Dr. Look for hashers.



Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=-

Monday, January 15, 2024

BMH3 #365 - 01/20/2024:CSI

 


 

****The rest of 2024 Trail signups are now available!  SIGN UP NOW!
https://teambrassmonkey.blogspot.com/2023/11/2024-hare-signups.html

 

 

 BMH3 #365 - 01/20/2024:CSI


When:

Saturday, January twenty, TwentyTwentyFour
• Main Pack 2PM show, 2:30PM Go

Where:

Carter Park
7221 Treaschwig Rd, Spring, TX 77373
https://maps.app.goo.gl/1evAy2HaFvPcBd7T6
30.05272974509469, -95.32650621483969

Hares:

Cant Stop Inhaling (CSI)

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:
No water crossings and length will be temperature dependent.

Bring:

WARM CLOTHES, IT's cold!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


FROM Twinkle Toes:

WE HAVE SURVIVED!! Since we're all vaccinated(you're vaccinated, right??!) and Covid numbers are going down like your Mom, the Brass Monkey hash will be returning to a more normal format!  

•YES we will have group start times!
•YES we will be having circles!
•YES we will have BEER AND MONKEYS!!!
•YES we will have $5 Hash Cash

Buuuuuutttt since Covid isn't 100% gone we're going to have a few changes:

•If covid numbers are up, Hares will lay trail A to A or A to A' - NO CARBACKS.
•Bring a drinking vessel! no more passing monkeys around the circle - and don't put the mouth of the 40 on the rim of your vessel.
•There will be hand sanitizer by the snacks and coolers. USE IT before touching common surfaces.
•Everyone has different comfort levels, if someone wants to keep their distance, or wear a mask, Respect their wishes.
•THE FRB helmet... how the fuck did we ever allow a cootie catcher like that to exist... Not sure


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=-

Saturday, December 30, 2023

BMH3 #364 – 01/06/2024 - Up Chupped the Monkey from the coconut grove

   









****2024 Trail signups are now available!  SIGN UP NOW! We need Hares for THE NEXT TRAIL!!!!
https://teambrassmonkey.blogspot.com/2023/11/2024-hare-signups.html

BMH3 #364 – 01/06/2024 - Up Chupped the Monkeys from the coconut grove

 When: 

Saturday, January Sixth, Two Thousand and Twenty Four

• Main Pack 2PM show, 2:30pm GO

• TWO Manned Beer Checks

 Where:

23110 Fox Hunt Dr, Spring, TX 77389

30.101133,-95.489442



Hares:

KatchUp


Sidenote:

 FROM THE HARES:

I know everyone's thinking it: new year, new me, right? Screw that! Let's keep being our fabulous mess of selves and start the new year off with a trail that scratches that itchy taint. This years first BMH3 trail was clocked in at 5.25 miles but I am sure the racists will probably end up shaving it down to 2 miles. The trail is dog friendly and there will be dos cerveza cheques supplied with HOT CIDER(make it yourself)

0n-0n bitches!

Bring:

Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 

Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:

FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking look in the sky and follow the big airplanes north.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133

KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141


0n-0n Bitches,

KatchUp

 

The Brass Monkey Hash runs on the north side of town every other Saturday. For more information, see http://teambrassmonkey.blogspot.com/.


Thursday, December 21, 2023




 BMH3 #363 – 12/23/2023 - The Second Ever Moon Over Monkies (MOM ™️ ®️ ©️) Trail!!! 

 When: 

Saturday, December Twenty Third, Two Thousand and Twenty Three

• Main Pack 7PM show, Live Hares 7:15pm GO

• ONE Manned Beer Check

 Where:

3383 S Panther Creek Dr, The Woodlands, TX 77381

(30.1546982, -95.4979049)

This is the front by the pool. Cocktor Spork and Womb Raider

 


Hares:

Cocktor Spork and Womb Raider


Sidenote:

 TRAIL STARTS AT SEVEN FUCKING PM


FROM THE (H)AIRS:

Ladies and gents, boys and girls, that time of year is upon us. That's right, we've run out of hares so Cocktor Spork and Womb Raider are left holding the bag to lay you bastards a trail. Since it is 12/23, we figure all kinds of people will be invited to family shit for some holiday, so we think it appropriate to give you all an out by throwing a hash! Not just any hash, but only the SECOND EVER Moon Over Monkies Hash. (MOM Hash ™️ ®️ ©️) 

You can expect a nighttime trail looking at all the muggle Xmas lights, while dodging all the cars of those crazy assholes trying to give their kids some fucking core memory of driving around and looking at other people's hard work. You should probably wear, like, bright colors and shit. This will be a live laid trail with some urban (to look at the damn lights, all holy and shit), and some shiggy, to fuck with people in the dark. Expect 3ish miles with one beer check and the need for a fucking headlight. Like, it's gonna be 7pm, wear a fucking headlight. Bring a friend, bring your mom, and bring a sweater for circle so you don't freeze your ass off. 

7pm show, 7:15pm hares go, then you assholes go after. You won't want to miss it. It's gonna be "great". 

0n-0n bitches!

Bring:

Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 

Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:

FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking look in the sky and follow the big airplanes north.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133

KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141


0n-0n Bitches,

Cocktor Spork 

 

(Updated by Cocktor Spork - 12/20/2023)

 

The Brass Monkey Hash runs on the north side of town every other Saturday. For more information, see http://teambrassmonkey.blogspot.com/.