BMH3 #393 – 2/15/2025: Brass Monkey 15th anniversary and Twinkle Toes Birthday campout!

 

 

Trails available in March! Sign up now! https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1YWKD179RbNf0422ij-uBywUbAE2Z_DijBVth6ydRejQ/edit?usp=sharing

 

BMH3 #393 – 2/15/2025: Brass Monkey 15th anniversary and Twinkle Toes Birthday campout!

When:

Saturday, February Fifteenth, TwentyTwentyFive
• Main Pack 1PM show, 1:30PM Go
• Manned Beer Check!

Where:

TRAIL and camping:
Double Lake Hunter camp on NFSR 220
Forest Service Rd 220, Coldspring, TX 77331
30.5331790344169, -95.13466434168369
https://maps.app.goo.gl/sL1SAkKX35KajKNB7

Hares:

Twinkle Toes

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:
Pack will DEPART AT 1:30!!! Don't be late!
Trail will be 4-6+ miles of glorious National Forest SHIGGY!  Expect regular shiggy, muddy shiggy, thorny shiggy!

CAMPING: For the on after, we will be CAMPING!!!!! After circle beer runs out and hash snacks are gone, you're on your own! Bring Your Own EVERYTHING! You'll need to take care of yourself until you can pack up and leave sunday morning! That means bring FOOD, WATER, BEER, and your POOP SHOVEL!
I highly recommend arriving a bit before trail and setting up your camp before trail. You can come as early as you want, even Friday!
These campsites are primitive, as in bring a poop shovel primitive!
It's looking like its going to get chilly Saturday night, so stop on the way to grab some firewood! either a couple bundles from the hardware store, or random places on the way to camp.

Bring:

WATER, you're camping and running, you'll get thirsty!
FOOD you have to feed yourself dinner, and maybe breakfast depending how fast you leave Sunday.
BOOZE, circle beer won't last all night
FIREWOOD
SHELTER
POOPSHOVEL!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.



Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
Twinkle Toes Signal ID: JamesS.42
0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=-

BMH3 #392 - 02/01/2025 - Homoglobins Third time's a charm? trail

 

 

 

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 BMH3 #392 - 02/01/2025 - Homoglobins Third time's a charm? trail

When:

Saturday, February First, Twenty Twentyfive
• Main Pack 2PM show, 2:30PM Go
• One Manned Beer Check!

Where:

Burroughs Park Pavilion
9738 Hufsmith Rd, Tomball, TX 77375 - and drive all the way to the pavilion in the back
30.13811394581269, -95.57557074460769
https://maps.app.goo.gl/XceBYR8nstCSf3yx9

Hares:

Homoglobin

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:
3.5 miles
Park in the furthest north spot by the pavilion(usual spot)
Weather should be fantastic!
Nothing more and never less!
One beer check.

Bring:

WATER, IT might not be cold
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=-

 

Brass Monkey #391 01/18/25 Penis Fly Crap's 18th Hashiversary

 

 

 

Trails available in March! Sign up now! https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1YWKD179RbNf0422ij-uBywUbAE2Z_DijBVth6ydRejQ/edit?usp=sharing

 

 

BMH3 #391 01/18/25: Penis Fly Crap's 18th Hashiversary

When:

Saturday, January Eighteenth, TwentyTwentyFive
• Main Pack 2PM show, 2:30PM Go

Where:

Actual START: 20504 Fourier Drive, New Caney, TX 77357
Plug address into APPLE MAPS, google doesn't have this address yet!
30.157686035228569, -95.29230170368169
Enter Porter's Mill Subdivision on Miller Heights Drive, and find your way to the pin.

For navigation purposes, go here, and keep driving south on Miller Heights Dr. looking for hashers.
30.163552213737503, -95.29207316795329
https://maps.app.goo.gl/JRLEW2fcSBip49pm8

Hares:
Penis Fly Crap

Sidenote:
FROM THE HARES:
Cum on out and celebrate 18 years of hashing with Penis Fly Crap.  You'll get a 3-5 mile trail,shiggy, a beer check, and waist high water crossings.  

Bring:
probably a change of warm clothes!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Get on 69 N
Take exit 159A toward FM 1485/New Caney
Take a Left onto 1485 N for 2.2 miles
Take a Left onto Gene Campbell Rd for 3.1 miles
Run Left onto Miller Heights Dr. for .6 miles
When you reach the fresh construction, look for hashers



Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=-

 

BMH3 #390 – 01/04/2025: KatchUps Birthday Extravaganza

  

 

We need hare for 1/18/25! Sign up now! https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1YWKD179RbNf0422ij-uBywUbAE2Z_DijBVth6ydRejQ/edit?usp=sharing

 

 

 

 

 

BMH3 #390 – 01/04/2025: KatchUps' start the year off wet trail

When:

Saturday, January Fourth, TwentyTwentyFive
• Main Pack 2PM show, 2:30PM Go

Where:

819 Timor Ln, Houston, TX 77090

https://maps.app.goo.gl/oKMGwxzVVyvEtK3k8
30.031972249684944, -95.45239987801945

Hares:

Ask Me Something Personal & KatchUp

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES: 

I would like to welcome everyone into the New Year with another amazing Birthday Trail. This years trail will have water, those backward facing thorns and a random ass dog sleeping in a decrepit, school? Yes that's right, I got all the things planned for this trail. It will be 3-5 miles in length with one water crossing so bring warm clothes for circle. I will be providing hot cider again this year so the water crossing should feel nice. I would say it's dog friendly but we do get close to some properties that aren't well fenced off and they do have dogs on property so be forewarned.

Bring:

HOT COCOA, IT IS COLD!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n,
-=Titty McGee=-

BMH3 #389 – 12/21/2024: Donnie The Retards' Birfday Trail

 

 

We need hare for 1/18/25! Sign up now! https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1YWKD179RbNf0422ij-uBywUbAE2Z_DijBVth6ydRejQ/edit?usp=sharing

 

 

 

 

 

BMH3 #389 – 12/21/2024: Donnie The Retards' Birfday Trail

When:

Saturday, December Twentyfirst, TWentyTwentyFour
• Main Pack 1PM show, 1:30PM Go

Where:

Woodson's Local Tap + Kitchen (1488)
2330 FM 1488, The Woodlands, TX 77384
https://maps.app.goo.gl/Qrx4vwxLk2o7mz68A
30.231692855200069, -95.49920617809069

Hares:

Donnie the Retard

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES: 

2 to 4ish miles of trails and shiggy. Water on trail is always possible so be unprepared as you normal would. No rain in the forecast, but we all know weather apps are fucking liars so who knows. Let's do this!

Bring:

WATER, IT IS HOT!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=-

BMH3 #388 – Womb Raider and Cocktor Spork's 2nd Anal nighttime lights trail?

  

 

 

2025 Hare Signups for the first half of the year are posted! Get yours now! https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1YWKD179RbNf0422ij-uBywUbAE2Z_DijBVth6ydRejQ/edit?usp=sharing

 

 

BMH3 #388 – Womb Raider and Cocktor Spork's 2nd Anal nighttime lights trail?

When:

Saturday, December Seventh TwoThousandTwentyFour
• Main Pack 1PM show, 1:30PM Go

Where:

Fox Springs Park, Spring, TX 77386
https://maps.app.goo.gl/2spBr6xuN77GQVc27

30.115476260769269, -95.40187903187869

Hares:

Cocktor Spork & Womb Raider

From the Hares:

This Saturday, Saturday, SATURDAY!  Join Womb Raider and Cocktor Spork for our second Anal nighttime lights trail! Except this year, it won't be at night, and there won't be lights. So yeah. That. 

Originally, we had planned a nighttime trail to cap off the last trail of the year, but that asshole Donnie the Retard snagged it for his birfday trail instead. So, with all the holiday chaos in full swing and people being booked every Saturday, we’ve decided to turn things up a notch with a 1:00pm trail instead so you can still be an early-afternoon asshole and get to your evening festivities!

Will it be live-laid? Maybe.

Will it be dead-laid? Maybe. 

Will it be laid at all? Also, maybe. 

You’ll just have to show up to find out! AT 1:00PM! Expect solid shiggy, a strong chance of rain (because, hares), potential water crossings depending on how the creeks look after the next few days of rain, at least one beer check, and the company of many fine assholes.

You won't wanna miss it! Be there or regret it forever!... or maybe not at all. But either way, be there at 1:00pm!!!!

0n-0n Bitches

Bring:

Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n,

BMH3 #387 -11/23/24 – Fuck Fuck Goose takes a baby monkey under his wing

 

 

 

2025 Hare Signups for the first half of the year are posted! Get yours now! https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1YWKD179RbNf0422ij-uBywUbAE2Z_DijBVth6ydRejQ/edit?usp=sharing

 

 

BMH3 #387 – Fuck Fuck Goose takes a baby monkey under his wing

When:

Saturday, November TwentyThird TwoThousandTwentyFour
• Main Pack 2PM show, 2:30PM Go

Where:

Little Cypress Creek Preserve
Telge Rd & Spring Cypress Rd, Cypress, TX 77429
29.9906569,-95.6562469
https://maps.app.goo.gl/L4N5fU8Gx3G8bv3Y7

Hares:

ShoulderPads the Virgin Hare & F*ck F*ck Goose.

Sidenote:

Get ready for an epic adventure that promises equal parts chaos and camaraderie. Or just pure chaos. This trail has it all: a Virgin Hare ready to test their mettle, uncharted territory that F*ck F*ck Goose has only scoped out on Google Maps, at least one beer check (maybe two if the stars and hares align), and the ever-present risk of getting lost. Expect questionable decisions and constant cursing of the hares.  ON-ON!
📏 Distance:
Trail is allegedly planned for 4 miles, but knowing the hares, you might be signing up for 14 miles of scenic suffering. Pack your sense of humor, an extra pair of socks, a headlamp, and a snack just in case.
🌿 Shiggy Factor:
Expect at least 20 feet of shiggy—but be prepared for 20 miles. The hares have no idea what they are getting themselves into.
💦 Wetness Factor:
If you make it through trail completely dry, then congratulations. For everyone else, the On-After has you covered with a heated pool to ensure you do not leave the day without a good soak.

Bring:

Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own.
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.
Swimsuit, Towel, and Drinks for HEATED POOL on after!

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141
0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=-