Wednesday, June 27, 2018

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 220 - Outside Cat & Penis First, Mouth Second's BIRFDAY Trail!



BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 220 - Outside Cat & Penis First, Mouth Second's BIRFDAY Trail!

When: Saturday, June 30th, at ***2:00pm!***

Where: Burroughs Park
9738 Hufsmith Road
Tomball, TX  77375

Hares: Penis First, Mouth Second & Outside Cat

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes, you'll get dirty), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent (if applicable), sunscreen, $$ for haberdashery: patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Take I-45 North to the Grand Parkway (TX-99) and go West, that's left.  Take that to Küykendahl Road and turn right.  Go until you hit Huffsmith, then turn left.  Park will be after the left curve.  Go to the back.  Look for assholes.

Sidenote:
Here we go people, Outside Cat & Penis First, Mouth Second have come together to celebrate their BIRFDAYs, and that can't be very good for either of them, so why should it be for the rest of us?  According to the hares this is going to be a LIVE trail!  You heard me right, people, LIVE, which we've only done like... twice?  Maybe?  At least one beer check.  They made it their goal to make you wet and bloody, so we'll see how well they do!  If you catch the hares, something may happen.  In their words, "You may regret catching us, but may the bold bring it on hard and learn a new reason to hate us." They said everyone should bring a DD, and expect a "YuccaLaid stand at finish"... whatever that means.

What’s the worst that could happen? We shall see…

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork

Saturday, June 09, 2018

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 219 - The 1st AИAL DILF Trail!



BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 219 - The 1st AИAL DILF Trail!

When: Saturday, June 16th, at ***2:00pm!***

Where: Jesse H. Jones Park & Nature Center
20634 Kenswick Drive
Humble, TX 77338

Hares: Ivanna Hairy ButtChug & Indiana Bones and the Temple of Poon

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes, you'll get dirty), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent (if applicable), sunscreen, $$ for haberdashery: patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Take I-69 (yeah, said it) to FM 1960, then turn left onto 1st St E/FM1960 Business W/Humble Westfield Rd. Go like 1.5-ish miles and turn right onto Kenswick Drive. Go straight all the way until you go balls deep into the park. Look for assholes.

Sidenote:
Ladies & Gentlemen, cum one cum all, to the 1st AИAL DILF Trail! That’s right, unbeknownst to our hares, but knownst to us, this will be the first of many DILF trails in the cumming years! So, what can you expect? According to the lying hares, you can expect 3-4 miles of some solid shiggy, with at least one beer check! Dog friendly, as long as they can swim. Same goes for virgins. This is also Father’s Day weekend, so wear your best dad inspired gear and make us proud! Tacky fannypack? Got it! Terrible dad joke shirt? Yup, in the bag! Dad socks and plaid shirts? Yes, we all know Ivanna has those. So cum on out and beat the heat with your monkey family and a bunch of DILFs. DILFs pay only $5 hashcash, wow, can you believe it?! One day only, you heard it here!

What’s the worst that could happen? We shall see…

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork