Saturday, December 23, 2017

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 207: Cows in Spaaaace, now with Monkeys!

When: Saturday, December 30th, at ***5:00pm!***

Where: Eleanor Tinsley Park
18-3600 Allen Parkway
Houston, TX 77019

Hares: Myseld and Vagineer

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $2 Hash Cash! (Don't get used to this Monkeys!)

D’erections:
From The Woodlands: Take I-45 south and exit 47A for Allen Parkway. Will be on your right pretty damn quick.

Sidenote From Platterpuss:
The" MastRUbation in Space Trail" has morphed into the new "Cows in Spaaaace Trail!" and this year we are adding Monkeys into the debauchery! Combining the traditions of Space City H3, MOOOOUSTON H3, and The Brass Monkey H3, we will orbit Houston at unheard of speeds in search of beer and other intoxicating substances.

Trail will be around 4 miles with two beer checks. Munchies and down down beer will be provided for circle, so bring $2 hash cash.
Start is at Elanor Tinsley Park at 5pm. Use the parking spaces along Allen Parkway between the skate park and the Federal Reserve Building.

Other equipment you will need: Headlamp, ID, money for beer check(s), change of clothes, coyote repellent, space suit with your own oxygen supply, drinking vessel, Mae West, deck of cards for quarantine, etc...

Trail is dog friendly, and on-after location should be as well (will confirm)


See you there!

Tuesday, December 12, 2017

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 206 - Redneck Abortion & Mud in My Crick's BIRFDAY Trail!

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 206 - Redneck Abortion & Mud in My Crick's BIRFDAY Trail!

When: Saturday, December 16th, at ***2:00pm!*** Note the start time due to daylight savings!***

Where: CHI St. Luke's Health
2255 E Mossy Oaks Rd, Spring, TX 77389
*Park away from the building in the parking lot closest to Mossy Oaks and Holsworth.*

Hares: Redneck Abortion & Mud in My Crick

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent, $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $20), stickers $1, patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
From Houston: Take I-45 North or Hardy Toll Road North to the Grand Parkway / TX-99 ramp/feeder - you don't need to actually get on 99! Take it west (that's left), then turn right on Holzwarth Road. Will be on your right. Park away from the building in the parking lot closest to Mossy Oaks and Holsworth.

Sidenote:
This is the BIRFDAY run for both Redneck Abortion & Mud in My Crick. It's hard to imagine celebrating such a thing, but alas, here we are. According to the hares (and their lies), you can expect 3-4 miles of mostly shiggy with at least one beer check. Give the hares, you can also bet you are going to get dirty as much as possible in mud, water crossings, or general yuckyness - so bring a change of clothes!

What’s the worst that could happen? We shall see…

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork