Thursday, November 17, 2016

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 178

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 178

When: Saturday, November 19th, at ***2:00pm*** NOTE THE TIME, SHIT GETS DARK EARLY NOW!

Where: TX-242 and Lazy River Road
Conroe, TX (30.208720,-95.402325)

Hares: Bit-me Houston & Twinkle Toes

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent, $$ for Haberdashery: T-shirts $20, stickers $1, patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
From Houston: Take I-45 North to Exit 79A for College Park Drive/Needham Road/TX-242. Turn right on TX-242 and go for about 3 miles. Right before you are about to cross a big bridge, there is a small road to the right past some chain-link fence that goes down and to the right, like it's going to go under the bridge, go there.

Sidenote:
(From Where Do You Get Off)
If I told you that this queen of the night, is taking you far from Heartbreak Hotel and step by step deeper into the shiggy for one moment in time how will I know that you give good love? I got nothing. But all at once I look to you. So, exhale and let me know when you believe that I will always love you because my love is your love. And that love is shiggy. 3-4 miles of shiggy and beer is all the man that I need. This dog friendly trail is laid where I learned from the best when I didn't know my own strength. This whole experience is so emotional but I believe in you and me. So join me in the shiggy where I run to you with the greatest love of all and a million dollar bill. Oh and bring bug spray and $5 hash cash.

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Red Light Special's #: (832) 484-9975
Twinkle Toes' #: (661) 342-1679

0n-0n Bitches,

Cocktor Spork

Wednesday, November 02, 2016

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 177

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 177

When: Saturday, November 5th, at ***3:00pm***

Where: H-E-B Creekside
26500 Kuykendahl Road
Tomball, TX 77375

Hares: Homoglobin & Mouth Organ

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent, $$ for Haberdashery: T-shirts $20, stickers $1, patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
From Houston (Tow options, check traffic):

Option 1: Take Hardy Toll Road or I-45 North to the Grand Parkway (99) West. Take the exit for Kuykendahl Road and go North. Go for about 5 miles and the H-E-B is on the corner of Kuykendahl Road and Creekside Forest Drive.

Option 2: Take Hardy Toll Road to I-45 or just take I-45 North to Exit 76B for Woodlands Parkway. Take that west for about 5 miles until you hit Kuykendahl Road, then turn left. Go for two miles and the H-E-B is on the corner of Kuykendahl Road and Creekside Forest Drive.

Sidenote:
Homoglobin just had a birthday, and now he needs to evaluate all his life's choices by laying a Brass Monkey trail. The hare says to expect a 3 mile trail with boobs, beer, and bad decisions. This will be dog friendly, will include water crossings, and a beer check! So cum one, cum all, and see if it's still going to be fucking 80° something in November! (I hate you, Texas, I want to wear my layers and accessories!)

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork’s #: (832) 372-5133
Where Do You Get Off?'s #: (281) 608-0004
Red Light Special's #: (832) 484-9975

0n-0n Bitches,

Cocktor Spork