Wednesday, July 26, 2017

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 196

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 196

When: Saturday, July 29, at 3:00pm!

Where: Lowe's Home Improvement Parking Lot
3052 College Park Drive
The Woodlands, TX 77384

Hares: Aryan Sisterhood & Croc of Shit

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent, $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $20), stickers $1, patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
From Houston: Take I-45 North or Hardy Toll Road until it runs into I-45, and exit 79A for TX-242 W/College Park Drive; you'll have the option to pay for the toll bridge, or you can exit and just turn left for free. Take 242 west and the shopping center is on your right behind the Wal-Mart and such. Look for assholes.

Sidenote:
FROM THE HARES: Cum one cum all to the 1st Fagassi-Sisterhood Trail. This trail's got it all, shiggy, water, and coeds!! It’s just like college if you went to a swampy state school full of rednecks (go Aggies). Expect 4-5 miles of everything North Woodlands has to offer. Any memories of similar trails can be entirely blamed on Croc of Shit and we fired that guy.

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
Where Do You Get Off's #: (281) 608-0004
Red Light Special's #: (832) 484-9975

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork


Tuesday, July 11, 2017

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 195

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 195

When: Saturday, July 15, at 3:00pm!

Where: Sundance Park
700 West Alden Bridge Drive
The Woodlands, TX 77382.

Hares: Dr. Stinkfinger & KatchUp

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent, $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $20), stickers $1, patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
From Houston: Take I-45 North or Hardy Toll Road until it runs into I-45, and exit TX-242 W/College Park Drive; you'll have the option to pay for the toll bridge, or you can exit and just turn left for free. Take 242 west until you hit Green Bridge Drive, then turn left. Take that until it hits Research Forest Drive, then turn right. Take that ot Branch Crossing Drive, then turn left. Take that to South Alden Bridge Drive, and turn right. Boom, the park will be on your right.

Sidenote:
It's that time of year, Dr. Stinkfinger is laying his trail! However, this year, for some reason, he's decided he is going to bring KatchUp along for the ride. Will he teach him how to be a good hare? Will he teach him how to get a girl? Will he kill him? We will put out a poll for votes and go from there. Expect 3-4 miles shiggy and a POOL ending! Rule #1: You will be at someone's house, so don't be a prick. Bring a bathing suit and change of clothes, because you *cannot* go into the pool wearing your dirty trail clothes. Why? That would make you a prick. And remember rule #1? Yeah.

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
Where Do You Get Off's #: (281) 608-0004
Red Light Special's #: (832) 484-9975

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork