Tuesday, October 15, 2013

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 98


When: Saturday, October 26th, 2:00pm!!!

Where:
Community Center Drive & WEST Rayford Road
Spring, TX 77389
(Close to Augusta Pines Equestrian Center)
(30.114083,-95.542496)

Hare(s): Where Do you Get Off?, Matthew McConnaGAY, Gee Pee Ess, Son of a Ditch, Red Light Special, KatchUp

Why: Because you like drinking period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash and shag bag (change of clothes). $$ for Haberdashery: T-shirts $15, Stickers $1, Patches $3 & $4, Socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course!

D'erections:

FROM HOUSTON: Head North on I-45 and take exit 70B toward Spring Stuebner/Rd-West then veer right Spring Stuebner/Rd-West which will take you under the freeway and make you head West. Go for like 5 miles then turn Right onto Kuykendahl Road. Go NW on Kuykendahl Road for about 2 1/2 miles then turn Right onto West Rayford Road. Community Center Drive will be on your left in less than a mile, right past a bridge over a creek.

Sidenote: FROM THE HARES: After a freak accident involving a GPS, some cool-aid, and urine, after a backhoe violated mother earth, after a famous actor’s loufa-mold spawned something incredible, almost exactly 9 months after a great crane made love to the sea came the immaculate births of these tragic failures of hashers and the bane of their existence for the rest of us; Gee Pee Ess, Son of a Ditch, Matthew McConnaGAY, and Where Do You Get Off?
These poor sods are joined by KatchUp and Red Light Special in what is sure to be an especially shitty trail. I mean this trail is so bad it has 6 hares! Who does that? I guess these wankers can’t seem to get it together. What’s worse, they are laying in an area that has already had a trail or 2 (or more) laid on it this year—how original!

This birthday let down is going to be more disappointing than what lies in their pants. It is going to be a birthday/Halloween themed trail with a few twists in there. Those of you who aren’t busy watching your shiggy socks bounce around in the dryer or can spare time from chewing on your ears should consider something else before attending. Should you show up, expect there to be shiggy, beer, boobs, shiggy, beer, prizes, mosquitoes, and possibly a little fun. Show up, bring hash cash, and an appetite for fun and debauchery, and celebrate this awful quadfecta of a birthday bash! 

If you have any questions, please reach out to one of the hares—I mean hell there are enough of them.

Well there you heard it people, make it happen!

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
MasturGator's #: (936) 444-8591


0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork


Saturday, October 12, 2013

Tired of having no BMH3 in my life.

Sup biotches!  I just realized y'all made me a contributor to this page...probably years ago when the BMH3 was founded and whatnot, but I never claimed to be real observant.  So I am looking at being in Galveston at the end of the month.  Any chance of getting a Monkey fix on the weekend of  November 1,2,3?

On-On!
Guamarhea Balls
AGM - Knuckledraggers H3

Thursday, October 10, 2013

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 97



When: Saturday, October 12th, 2:00pm!!! (NOTE THE TIME!)

Where:
The GatorSntach Motel
7 Still Glen Court
The Woodlands, TX 77381

Hare(s): SpeedbUMPs & CSI

Why: Because you like drinking period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash and shag bag (change of clothes). $$ for Haberdashery: T-shirts $15, Stickers $1, Patches $3 & $4, Socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course!

D'erections:

FROM HOUSTON: Take I-45 North or Hardy Toll Road until it dead-ends into I-45. Take Exit 76B for Woodlands Parkway. Take Woodlands Parkway for 3-4 miles, then turn left onto South Panther Creek Drive. Go to the stop sign with the school on your right, go past it, then turn left in the first subdivision right past the church onto CoralBerry Road. Take your second right onto Yewleaf then your second right again onto Still Glen Court.

Sidenote: SpeedbUMPs will be haring this along with CSI, so you know two things, it will be dog friendly and there will be tit checks. Originally scheduled somewhere Houston-ish, Masturgator convinced the hares that The Woodlands is the best place for this trail because of the vast uncharted shiggy. Actually Gator just didn't want to have to drive to Houston to beermeister and stuff because he knew PMS would just get angry and yell at him. I hate it when mommy and daddy fight. EXPECT: TWO beer checks, lots of shiggy, trail about 4-ish miles... not like 4-ish TwinkleToes miles, like 4 real miles. That's what SpeedbUMPs says, but I don't think he's ever laid a trail with CSI before. Bring dry clothes for on-after, and if you expect to be gettin' all up on SpeedbUMPs' b00bs, bring cash. I will be in Vegas for my Grandma's wedding, true story, so expect a circle RA'd by Gator, unless PMS gets mad at him, then it might be RamRod.

Well there you heard it people, make it happen!

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
MasturGator's #: (936) 444-8591

0n-0n Bitches,

Cocktor Spork