Wednesday, May 31, 2017

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 192 - The MF Trail

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 192 - The MF Trail

When: Saturday, June 3rd, at 3:00pm!

Where: Black Jack Lane, Magnolia, TX 77354

Hares: Womb Raider & Dr. Stinkfinger

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent, $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $20), stickers $1, patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
From Houston: Take Hardy Toll Rd N or I-45 N to exit 76B/ Woodlands Parkway. Woodlands Parkway to Branch Crossing Dr (~6.5 miles), LEFT at Branch Crossing Dr (~1 mile), LEFT at Red Bay Cir (~1 mile), RIGHT at Burr Oak Trace then RIGHT on Black Jack Ln. Look for hashers and park on side of Black Jack Ln.

Sidenote:
FROM THE HARES: This is the MF trail, a shortened version of the MILF trail in name only. Dr Stinkfinger has scouted out a glorious 3.5 to 4.5 mile trail of lovely shiggy, thorns and water crossings. Trail is dog friendly. In typical Womb Raider style there will be at least one manned beer check with good craft beer. Expect some homemade baked goods for circle too.

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
Where Do You Get Off's #: (281) 608-0004
Red Light Special's #: (832) 484-9975

0n-0n Bitches,

Cocktor Spork

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 191 - The 5th Anal MILF Trail!

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 191 - The 5th Anal MILF Trail!

When: Saturday, May 20th, at 3:00pm!

Where: ***George Mitchell Preserve / Rob Flemming Park***
AFTER 6000 Creekside Forest Drive
The Woodlands, TX 77389.
(NOT EXACT ADDRESS).

Hares: The Land of MILF & Honey, PMS, Indiana Bones and the Temple of Poon, & Just Natasha

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: $5 for hash cash, shag bag (change of clothes), BUG SPRAY, PI repellent, $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $20), stickers $1, patches $3, socks $10, and a thirst for beer of course.

D’erections:
From Houston: Take I-45 North to Woodlands Parkway going west for about 4 miles. Turn left at Gosling. Turn right at Creekside Forest. Go to the traffic circle (round-about) and take first right onto Creekside Forest Drive. George Mitchell Preserve trailhead is on the right and a large dirt parking lot next to that.

Sidenote:
FROM THE HARES: Celebrate all MILFs and MILFs-to-be with the craziest shit show celebrating 5 years of the Brass Monkey MILF trail!. You can expect stages of life challenges during trail with beer and shots while our enjoying our shiggy trails. Don’t know what that means, well you got to cum to find out!

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
Where Do You Get Off's #: (281) 608-0004
Red Light Special's #: (832) 484-9975

0n-0n Bitches,

Cocktor Spork

Friday, May 05, 2017

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 190 - The Monkeys Invade Texas InterHash!

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 190 - The Monkeys Invade Texas InterHash!

When: Texas InterHash Weekend! - Drinko de Mayo - Seventho de Mayo

Where: Sherwood Forest Faire, 1883 Old Hwy 20, McDade, TX 78650

Hare: A fuckton of people.

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

Bring: Your TXIH rego'd ass!... and probably a vessel!

D’erections: 
From Houston: Drive like two fucking hours west, boom.

Sidenote:
IT'S TEXAS FUCKING INTERHASH!!! That means it’s time to pack up, and roll out – and do some seedy shit along the way! If you’re rego’d for Texas InterHash, listen up!! If you’re not rego’d for TXIH, have fun… doing your…. I don’t know, whatever lame people do. 

Texas InterHash is being thrown by Huzzah H3, and it looks to be fucking amazing! Some things to remember:
• We are guests, so don’t be a prick.
• Thank your hosts, they did a ton of shit for you! 
• Clean up after your damn self

That about sums it up, so try not to be a fuckup! Or be a fuckup, but in a good way, like when you fart loudly on accident, but the time and place is perfect.

There will be a Brass Monkey RA’d circle on Saturday at some point – I could tell you what is on the schedule, but it isn’t laminated, so it really doesn’t count. That’s just science, kids.
Remember: YOU CAN ONLY DO THIS IF YOU ARE REGO’D FOR TEXAS INTERHASH. IF YOU ARE NOT REGO’D FOR TEXAS INTERHASH AND YOU TRY TO SHOW UP FOR THIS, WE WILL TRY TO MAKE A JOUSTING LANCE DISAPPEAR USING ONLY YOUR HELP!

So cum one, cum all, to TEXAS INTERHASH, and don’t be a prick!

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)

0n-0n Bitches,
Cocktor Spork