BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 14

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 14 "The Lamest Pub Crawl Ever" ON August 7th, 2010 5:00pm

When: Saturday August 7th, 2010, 5:00pm.

Where: Chuy's (In the Bar)
18035 Interstate 45
Shenandoah, TX 77385-8717
(936) 321-4440

Hare(s): Donnie The Retard

Why: Because you like drinking period.

Bring: Money for drinks at each of the stops...yes there will be more than one so I guess the pub crawl isn't completely lame.

D'erections: From downtown head North on I-45 take exit 77 (Lake Woodlands Dr/Research Forrest Dr/Tamina exit) stay on the feeder for 2.4 miles and Chuy's will be on your right. It is past Research Forrest/Tamina Rd and if you hit FM 242 you've gone to far.

Sidenote: We will provide some down down beer at the end for circle so there is no hash cash just bring money for your drink of choice at each bar. Because I am awesome and I felt like living up to my name I completely failed to provide a real trail for this weekend; however the Brass Monkey every other Saturday tradition must be kept alive so I give you "The Lamest Pub Crawl Ever".

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 13

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 13 ON July 24th, 2010 3:00pm

When: Saturday July 24th, 2010, 3:00pm.

Where: Cocktor Spork's House (Across the street from Donnie and ESPN's house)
28 Painted Sunset
The Woodlands, TX 77380

Hare(s): ESPN and Donnie The Retard

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too!!!

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12 (only women's sizes left), Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: From downtown head North on I-45 take exit 73 (Rayford/Sawdust) go left at the light which will take you underneath the freeway go straight for less than a mile then make a left onto Sawdust Road (3rd stop light). Follow Sawdust Road for less then a mile and make a Left on Sawmill Road (2nd stop light). Not the first opening, but the second opening in the center island/divider make a Left onto Dreamweaver Circle. Spork's house will be down on the left at the corner of Painted Sunset and Dreamweaver Circle.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 12 BMH3 / EATMEH3

"Yard Ralph's Birthday Run" ON July 10th, 2010 5:00pm

When: Saturday July 10th, 2010, 5:00pm.

Where:Rocky Creek Park \ Campground (Lake Somerville)
Park is at the intersection of FM 1948 and Rocky Creek Park Road
Burton, TX 77835

Hare(s): Yard Ralph

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too!!!

Bring: BYOB...$2 to get into park campground, $10 for a campsite if you choose to stay the night, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: This the link to the intersection where the Park\Campground is http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=Rocky+Creek+Road+and+FM+1948&sll=30.298204,-96.550598&sspn=0.176968,0.362892&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=Farm+to+Market+Road+1948+%26+Rocky+Creek+Park+Rd,+Burton,+Washington,+Texas+77835&z=16

SPECIAL SIDE NOTE If you want to come to this it would be best to RSVP because their will be food at the end and a head count is needed. Also if you would like to camp on Friday or Saturday contact me and I will let Yard Ralph know so she can reserve more campsites.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 11 "Superheroes"

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 11 "Superheroes" ON June 26th, 2010 5:00pm

When: Saturday June 26th, 2010, 5:00pm.(new start time)

Where: Creekwood Park
3833 South Panther Creek Drive
The Woodlands, TX 77381

Hare(s): Naughty Ice Box

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too!!!

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: From downtown take I-45 North to exit 76B (Woodlands Pkwy). The ramp will merge you onto Woodlands Pkwy go 3 miles and you will make a left on S. Panther Creek Dr. The park will be half a mile down the road on the left.

SPECIAL SIDE NOTE This is Naughty Ice Box's virgin hare so lets all come out and have a great time. Because the Brass Monkey's love their themed runs Naughty Ice Box requests that everyone should come sporting your favorite "Superhero" attire.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 10

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 10 "SPORK'S BALLS OF FURY RUN" ON June 12, 2010 3:00pm

When: Saturday June12, 2010, 3:00pm.

Where: Kroger
6616 Fm 1488 Rd
Magnolia, TX 77354

Hare(s): Cocktor Spork

Why: Because you like drinking with a little shiggytastic running mixed in too!!!

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Stickers $1, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: Coming from downtown go north on I-45 to exit 81 (FM 1488). Go west on 1488 for 2.7 miles and the Kroger will be on your right.

SPECIAL SIDE NOTE: This run will be celebrating the start of the World Cup which begins on Friday, June 11th. Wear Soccer Socks, Goalie Gloves, a Cup to protect your Balls Of Fury, your Favorite Teams Jersey/Shirt, or whatever else you can think of Soccer Related. BE CREATIVE PEOPLE! 

We will be gathering at the 7 Leagues Mexican Restaurant before the Hash to watch USA vs. England at 1:30 CST. You will pass this restaurant (it will be on your right) just before you come to the Kroger parking lot, but it has limited parking so parking in the Kroger lot is your best bet. Once the game completes around 3:00 PM, the hash will commence from the Kroger parking lot.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 8 UPDATED!!!

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 8 "ESPN'S RED HEADED SLUT RUN" ON May 15, 2010 3:00pm

When: Saturday May 15, 2010, 3:00pm.

Where: Kroger
2301 Rayford Road
Spring, TX 77386

Hare(s): ESPN

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!!There may be Red Headed Slut jello shots on trail woohoo!!

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Stickers $1), thirst for beer of course.Bring a a few extra dollars for potential extra special beer stops other than the one to two we will provide. Wear a red wig to supper "Red Headed Sluts" across the world.

D'erections: Coming from downtown go north on I-45 to exit 73 (Rayford\Sawdust) and make a right at the light onto Rayford Road. Go 2.1 miles and the Kroger will be on your left hand side.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 7

Zippy Trail at the H4 Campout ON May 1, 2010 3:30pmish

When: Saturday May 1, 2010, 3:30pmish.

Where: H4 camp out (If you want to participate in this trail than sign up for the H4 Spring Campout http://h4.org/mismanagement/mismanagement-2009-10/2010-spring-campout/ )

Hare(s): Donnie The Retard

Why: Because you like drinking.

Bring: Your butt

D'erections: Rego for the H4 Spring Campout already

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 6 "Brass Monkey\Mosquito H3 Special"

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 6 "Brass Monkey\Mosquito H3 Special" ON April 17, 2010 3pm

When: Saturday April 17, 2010, 3pm.

Where: Brown Park
Tomball, TX 77377
It's Near the intersection of Brown Road and 249

Hare(s): Donut Holer

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!! On a side note.

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Patches $3, Stickers $1), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: If you are coming from Downtown go north on I-45. Take exit 60C to merge onto Sam Houston Parkway. Take the Sam Houston Pkwy to Tomball Pkwy\TX 249 N. Go 13 miles and make a left on Brown Road. Then go 1 mile and make a right on Coral Canyon. The park will be about a half mile up on your right.

TXIH Keg War!!!

Will the Brass Monkeys represent the South well?

TXIH PRELUBE

PUBCRAWL PRESENTED BY THE BRASS MONKEY H3

When: Thursday April 8, 2010, 6:30pm.

Where: The 19th Hole Bar & Grill
202 Sawdust Road, Spring, TX 77380
(281) 363-2574‎

Hare(s): Donnie The Retard

Why: Because you want to celebrate the coming of TXIH 2010

Bring: $3 for mist makers and shot stop plus money for what ever drinks you choose along the way.

D'erections: Coming from downtown Houston head north on I-45 exit Rayford/Sawdust (exit 73) make left underneath the freeway and immediately get over to the right lane. Make a right on Borough Park Drive just past the HEB and the bar will be on your left.

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 5 "Spork's Easter Egg Hunt"

BRASS MONKEY H3 RUN # 5 "Spork's Easter Egg Hunt" ON April 3, 2010 3pm

When: Saturday April 3, 2010, 3pm.

Where: HEB in the Sterling Ridge/Indian Springs Shopping Center
Corner of Woodlands Parkway and Kuykendahl

10777 Kuykendahl Rd
The Woodlands, TX 77383

Hare(s): Cocktor Spork

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!! On a side note.

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Patches $3, Stickers $1), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: Coming from downtown Houston head north on I-45 exit Woodlands Pkwy (exit 76B) the on ramp dumps off directly onto Woodlands Pkwy. Follow Woodlands Pkwy for approx 5.5 miles until you come to Kuykendahl Rd intersection you will then make a left on Kuykendahl Rd and a quick right into the HEB parking lot.

Notes: There will be some serious Shiggy... Woodlands Shiggy:) There will be water crossings so bring a change of socks and or shoes. Also, SunBlock and Bug Spray are always good to have.

BMH3 #4

When: Saturday March 20, 2010, 3pm.

Where: I-45 Exit 79
The trail will be off of FM 242 east of I-45. D'erections below.

Hare(s): AssGrabber

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!! On a side note AssGrabber has also set a second Kayak and Canoe friendly trail for those interested.

Bring: $5, shag bag(change of clothes), $$ for haberdashery (T-shirts $12, Patches $3, Stickers $1), thirst for beer of course.

D'erections: Coming from downtown go North on I-45 take exit 79 (FM 242/College Park) and go right on FM 242. Once you turn right you will be heading east on 242 pass through Lexington Dr/Needham road intersection and go .5 miles to Lazy River Rd (It looks like an access road). Make a right onto Lazy River Road before you come to a bridge that crosses the San Jacinto River and follow the road until it circles underneath FM 242. Right when you cross under FM 242 there will be a small clearing for parking. If by some chance you end up on the bridge and you are crossing over the San Jacinto River you have gone to far. Sorry there is no addresses but if you have a GPS I can give you Latitude= 30°12'33.68"N and Longitude= 95°24'9.25"W.

Side Note: We just got another order of shirts for all of you that did not get one at BMH3#1 and this run is going to be a wet one so bring a dry change of clothes.

BMH3 #3

When: Saturday March 6, 2010, 3pm.

Where: Bear Branch Park
5200 Research Forest Drive
The Woodlands, TX 77381

Hare(s): ESPN

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!!

Bring: $5, shag bag, $$ for haberdashery (Patches $3, Stickers $1), thirst for beer of course.

Be there or be square MoFos!!!

This page is boring.

I'm bored now.

that funky monkey

BMH3 #2

When: Saturday February 20, 2010, 2pm.

What: BMH3 #2

Where: Walmart Supercenter
1025 Sawdust Rd
Spring/The Woodlands, TX 77380

Hare: Twinkle Toes

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!!

Bring: $5, shag bag, $$ for haberdashery (Brass Monkey H3 Patches $3, Stickers $1), thirst for beer of course. Directions to the on after will be given out at the Hash.

Updated Stats...

14 pounds consumed because espn had a secret stash of carne asada cause she's awesome...ok well it's gone now so 15 pounds...
72 hamburgers....
60 hotdogs
20 veggie burgers
27 bagels
40 kolaches
4 1/2 kegs
20 18 packs of beer
2 cases of forties plus OJ (two 40's exploded because glass doesn't bounce on tile floors)
1 cooler of jello shots / jello penises plus the jello shots my neighbor brought over
3 to 4 gallons of whiskey
1 bucket of margaritas
3.25 liters of tequila
1/2 a bottle of Hot Sex which I found in my freezer and almost made me vomitt
A shit load of taco bell
and a partridge in a pear tree...

I'm sure there's more I am forgetting but all in all it was a blast...glad everyone made it out.

current stats.....as we remember.

On Friday, 15 pounds of Carne asada was devoured by the Brass Monkey.
1 keg was emptied in 6 hours and 58 minutes.
4 people puked. (piggus, 3m, espn, bumper)
1 person remained hungover and non-functional all day. (espn)

Donnie remains quite efeminate!
Net is gone, again....cause he is taking it in the anus again. guess that is what happens when he likes to act like Brownie and go to bed early.

Teacher is mad, and running around the house looking for Net.
Flip cup is so last year. boring. haha
it's beer pong/beirut and full contact ball retrieval.

on on
gaylord focker

BRASS MONKEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ON GOING.
kickball champions of the world are Team A. the Don-Gay-Net association. with a far lesser force of 9 versus the outsiders of that wench Raisin, who had 15 players and still could not match the ferocity of Team superawesome!!!!

brass monkey. "we put the fuck, in fuck yeah!"

on on

Itinerary for Events up to and Including BMH3 #1

Ok people here is the itinerary of the events surrounding the sure to be epic BMH3 #1.

Thursday February 4, 2010

1.    Kimchi’s arriving at IAH at 2:52pm. Spork and I will have 2 vehicles to accommodate everyone

2.    Bob will be renting a car due to his extended stay and will be picking up Hoot (5:30pm Terminal B) and our esteemed mystery guest (4:30pm-ish Terminal C) (if you have not linked up with Bob you should do so now)

3.    Kimchi caravan will make a pit stop at the Liquor Store so you may pickup any necessary booze taking into account there is an already iced down keg of Lone Star awaiting you at the House of Retard (DTR and ESPN’s house…duhhh).

4.    BBQ Mexican Style at the House of Retard if everyone’s down maybe chip in a couple bucks and we will get an assload of Carne Asada, Tortillas, homemade Guacamole and Pico and have a nice little drunken Mexican Style BBQ minus the Chelada.

5.    Beer Pong, Flip cup, The Dreidel…well you get the picture

If you happened to be driving in or are in the area and would like to take part in Thursday’s madness let me know and I will give you my address/directions

Friday February 5, 2010

1.    Wake up and shake off your hangovers (will have bagels and stuff for the morning)

2.    Tentative hung over poker game BFE style.

3.    If we don’t play poker I say we play kickball to get some blood flowing

4.    Do pretty much whatever we want I’m assuming there will be drinking involved

5.    5:00pm leave the House of Retard in a convoy down to Houston. H4 with the help of McPisser has agreed to run a small trail for the Out of Towners who will miss the normal Sunday run. This run will coincide with H4’s regularly scheduled Happy Hour. McPisser said we will either be Meeting at the Happy Hour location or at a bar near by for the trail. Happy Hour usually runs about 3 hours so around 9pm we will be heading out.

6.    Return to the House of Retard which will be converted into the Palatial Palace of Retarded Love with the help of another esteemed mystery guest who fucking rocks….you know who you are.

7.    Music, potential for Karaoke, Beer Pong, Flip cup, The Dreidel…well you get the picture

Again, if you happened to be driving in or are in the area and would like to take part in Friday’s madness let me know and I will give you my address/directions and you are welcome to crash

Saturday February 6, 2010…dun dun dun

1.    The day we have all been waiting for will be upon us

2.    Wake up and shake off your hangovers (will have bagels and stuff for the morning)

3.    2:00pm Brass Monkey H3 #1 beginning at the Ranch Hill Saloon (for details see http://teambrassmonkey.blogspot.com/ or http://www.hashspace.com/group/brassmonkeyh3 )

4.    On after at the Palatial Palace of Retarded Love will have burgers, hot dogs, and snacky cakes along with beer of course.

5.    Entertainment provided by an esteemed pretty pretty princess

6.    Party until your liver falls out…that is if you still have one that functions.

Sunday February 7, 2010

1.    Wake Up will have Bagels and Kolaches

2.    Take Kimchis and Hoot to the Airport we will leave at 10:00am…should give you guys plenty of time to make your 12:00 noon flights (takes 20 minutes to get to the Airport)

3.    Those of you who are not flying out are welcome to stay for the Super Bowl. H4 will also be having their annual pooper bowl run (for details http://h4.org/calendar/ )

4.    Clean up, watch the Super Bowl get drunk…again

5.    I have Monday off so if you need/want to crash an extra night you are more than welcome, but come Monday you don’t have to go home but you got to get the Fuck outta my House, smooches!!!!

Key notes

1.    There should be plenty of floor, couch, and beds for everyone. I will have some sleeping gear for people; however I would suggest bringing what ever you need just in case (air mattress, sleeping bag, pillow…etc)

2.    Bring a towel for showering purposes if you are crashing.

3.    Standard Hash attire should suffice for the weekend…nothing fancy going on here…we will be drinking Lone Star all weekend enough said.

4.    Again, if you are coming in from out of town and you want to come over/crash before Saturday just let me know by responding to this email.

WE PUT THE “FUCK” IN “FUCK YEAH” – BMH3

Love,

DTR

Behold!!!!

The wrath of "The Dreidel" shall reign down upon you!!! MUHAHAHAHA!!!!

It shall be unleashed BMH3 weekend...hell it we'll probably have to test it out before that, but you mofos best be ready!!!

Updated Start Info!!!

When: Saturday February 6, 2010, 2pm.

Where: Ranch Hill Saloon
24704 Interstate 45 # 103
Spring, TX 77386-1928
(281) 298-9035

Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!!

Bring: $5, shag bag, $$ for haberdashery (Brass Monkey H3 shirts available $12, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course, sleeping bag or something to sleep on if you are crashing. Directions to the on after will be given out at the Hash.

Local Hotels

If there is anyone that would prefer staying at a hotel their are several less than 2 miles away from my house where the on after will be.

1. Holiday In Express: http://maps.google.com/maps/place?cid=8861345849560243450&q=Hotels&hl=en&cd=1&cad=src:pplink&ei=KHdQS625No60yQTouezWBA

The rate for that weekend will be $99.00

2. La Quinta: http://maps.google.com/maps/place?cid=12596933133610949954&q=Hotels&hl=en&cd=2&cad=src:pplink&ei=KHdQS625No60yQTouezWBA

The rate for that weekend will be between $89.00 - $99.00

3. Extended Stay America: http://maps.google.com/maps/place?cid=11715806270794029498&q=Hotels&hl=en&cd=3&cad=src:pplink&ei=KHdQS625No60yQTouezWBA

The rate for that weekend will be $64.99

4. Super 8: http://maps.google.com/maps/place?cid=8783593165360668907&q=Hotels&hl=en&cd=5&cad=src:pplink&ei=KHdQS625No60yQTouezWBA

The rate for that weekend will be $65.00

Again there is plenty of floor/couch space, but if you would prefer something to yourself feel free to book a room and we can organize transportation to and from the hotels.

Hash groups in Attendance!

So far it seems that there is quite the regal gathering gonna occur in The Woodlands of Texas. Seems mystical...but here we go, in no particular order: Kimchi H3, Knuckledraggers H3, aCHUMP H3, Koustin H3, Austin H3, San Antonio H3 and still waiting to hear if those retards in the valley will be sending a contingency. (The ICBINMH3)

This message was brought to you by: Chelada, aCHUMP H3, and more cheladas.

Brass Monkey H3 #1

What: BMH3 #1
When: Feb. 6th 2010 2pm
Where: TBD
Why: Because you like drinking with a little running mixed in too!!!
Bring:$5, shag bag, $$ for haberdashery (Brass Monkey H3 shirts available $12, Patches $3), thirst for beer of course, sleeping bag or something to sleep on if you are crashing


This is all the info we have so far, but I do know there is a contingency of out of towners coming in to support this awesome event on Thursday. So, in actuality the party really starts Thursday with the forecast showing Karaoke and a visit to H4 Thirsty Thursday. Friday will most likely have other Drunken activities taking place I'm sure. Then Saturday will be upon us and the dream that is the BMH3 will be realized. The on after will be at my and ESPN's house with a side venue located directly across the street (Spork's house, yes that is my brother and yes we live across the street from each other). There should be plenty of crash space between the houses and if you can't find a couch or a bed (other than my own) grab some floor. A sleeping bag would probably be a good idea, but regardless everyone is welcome. Plenty more info to cum.

Lakers vs. Heat

Last night while I was watching the Lakers vs. Heat and Stu Lance, one of my favorite announcers, was making a comment about the Lakers young center Andrew Bynum. As Bynum was setting a pick Stu called him "The Great Wall of Bynum"...it's not nearly as funny now as it was live, but Bynum proceeded to have his best game of the season. The kid definitely has talent but as of late his defense has been suspect. That worries me a bit because that what he's in there for; blocking shots and rebounding scoring is just a bonus. Regardless the Lakers won so that's all that matters. Tomorrow they play the Rockets and I will be there live rollin deep with a Lakers contingency. Why can't it be Thursday already for the love of all that is good and holy, damn you Tex Mex!!!!

Happy New Year!

This may be one of the funniest pictures of my drinking career!!!

Read the name tag...that's right my sister got me a shirt that says hello my name is ninja. But I think the Do-rag and the Manischewitz really complete the look.

TXIH 2008

As any good Kimchi I felt the need to saturate hashers with stupid catch phrases. The all time favorite "Fuck yeah!!!" was a crowd pleaser as usual, but "No Roger you tiger, now" seemed to be the favorite for the weekend. ESPN and Gaylord should be posting pictures shortly.

The Lakers Kick ASS!!!!

Kobe drops 52 and The Lakers beat Dallas 104-108 in overtime. Who's the best team in the League? Say it for me one time...The Los Angeles Lakers.

Prediction: Brownie will state something along the lines that I am delusional; however the facts are the facts and Denver is currently holding the 9th spot in the west. FYI only the top 8 get into the post season.

Side Bet: Brownie, I will bet one 40 oz of the Malt liquor of your choosing that the Denver Nuggets will not make the playoffs.

Fuck Yeah!!!

Well it looks like ESPN and I are going to try to plan a trip to Europe next year. I've only spent a little time in Germany so I'm pretty excited. ESPN and I were discussing the details yesterday when I came up with a goal for this particular trip should we actually take it. My goal is to learn how to say "Fuck Yeah" in every country we go to. I know it sounds goofy, but it will a good time fo shizzle!!!

Anything and Everything

If you haven’t seen NBN’s blog then you don’t know the Lakers made a huge move and picked up Pau Gasol an All Star caliber big man in exchange for Kwame “stone hands” Brown, Javaris Crittenton, and some draft picks. If everyone gets back healthy I think there’s a good chance the purple and gold could go all the way this season and they’re so young that they’ll be contending for a while. Derek Fisher is the only player on the roster over 30 even the newly acquired Gasol is only 27. It’s looking pretty naughty in Lakerland

On another note I finally got to ride my bike on Saturday (It had been 10 days) and had a nice ride until I almost rear ended some dude because he slammed on his brakes to turn with out signaling. I was coming down this road called FM 1488 going about 45. There was construction all over the place and the road was covered with gravel/dirt/mud. I had a good cushion between the guy ahead and I, but when he stopped I hit the brakes and my back tire locked up most likely because of the debris on the road. Then the back end of the bike swung to the left a little because I was in a slight turn. I straightened up and rode the brake until I stopped. It was a little scary, but it was good experience learning wise and something they taught us during the safety course I took. I had to pull off the road for a second and collect myself because that was my first experience like that being that I've only had the bike for a month and a half.

I have to say the Super bowl was a very good game and it's always nice to get hammered and hang out with friends and my crazy family. Even though I was rooting for the Patriots and a possible perfect season I am happy for Eli Manning. I bet it feels good to step out of big bro's shadow. Man, I know that was a great win and the Giants played a good game, but god damn they are beating a dead horse with this story on ESPN (not my wife the TV channel) they just keep saying the same thing over and over and over. The super bowl was great, but I'm sure there was other sports news. I will give a warning to all those drinkers out there that hooters wings are like crack after a long night of drinking, you eat one then keep coming back. I ate way too many wings last night and this morning I felt like a steaming pile of cow dung. Booze was the main cause, but my stomach told me the wings did not help things. Until next time Biatches!!!!

It's been a while....

It's been a while since ESPN and I have worked out on a regular basis and last night we started a new gym. It's more of a martial arts gym but the have all kinds off classes like Brazilian Ju-Jitsu, Kickboxing, Boxing, and Fight fit classes (circuit training). We did the circuit training class yesterday and my chubby ass almost could get out of bed because of how sore I was, but it's a great feeling now if it would only stop raining I could ride my bike and all would be right with the universe.
On another note BFE is less than 6 months away we should probably start planning soon and bombard Lip-Lock-Me with annoying emails!!! Until next time biatches!!!

And The Crowd Goes Silent!!!

In the midst of the Lakers longest winning streak in 4 years the Lakers 20 year old center Andrew Bynum goes down with a knee injury. Much of the Lakers recent success has been attributed to Bynum's elevated play. He's been a Monster in the middle averaging a double double (13.1 points, 10.2 rebounds). On Sunday versus the Memphis Grizzlies Bynum was going up for a rebound and landed on Lamar Odom's foot twisting his knee on the way down. Today, it was released that he will be out for at least 8 weeks. That leaves Kwame Brown in the middle and the Lakers without there second biggest threat. This could not have come at a worse time considering the Lakers have long road trip coming up and their next 3 games are against the top three teams in the west Phoenix, San Antonio, and Dallas. If they can keep some of the momentum they have and get through the next stretch they should be alright, but it's going to be tough. Bynum get well soon, please!!!!

Sport Betting

I heard something funny on the radio today about gambling on sports. I was listening to the Mike Tirico Show on Espn radio. A guy name Erik Kuselias was filling in for him and they were discussing why he suggested to a friend why they should pick West Virginia to beat Oklahoma. Apparently some of Erik's friends were wondering who they might pick because they hadn't heard any specifics on that particular game. Then he goes into this description about “the secretary rule”. Basically, if you are ever involved in a betting pool at work and you want to know who’s going to win break into the office of the person who is running the pool and look to see who all the secretaries picked then pick the opposite. He went on to say “If there were a pool about the West Virginia/Oklahoma game every secretary and their mother would have picked Oklahoma because it was too easy”. He told his friends to take West Virginia and obviously it worked out, but it’s still pretty funny.

Lakers....Master List...etc...

Just 4 weeks until we throw down at TEX MEX. What that means is it's time to start getting the Master List together. I will post something on the Tex Mex blog to get the List started.

I know it’s been a while since my last post, but better late than never. I was strictly instructed this morning by a large Columbian gentleman to "update my fucking blog already". Might I add this large Columbian gentleman is the gayest person I know and likes to smear feces on his face and dance naked in his garage.

Moving on the Lakers have turned out to be a pleasant surprise and if they continue to play this way they are a Shawn Marion away from being a true contender. With the new found confidence of youngsters like Jordan Farmar and Andrew Bynum they look like they might be able to make a little run this year. Even Sasha Vujacic has been a surprise this year, maybe that's because he actually started make the shots he’s taking, nevertheless I am impressed and I hope he keeps it up.

Today I am going to by my first motorcycle I am pretty excited. It's a nice custom bike made by Yamaha. Yesterday my co-workers decorated my office for my birthday. It was pretty damn funny and Nick would have especially gotten a kick out of the theme...

Brown table covers,Toilet paper, toilet paper seats, and then there's my window of poop and they even went so far as to rub brown candy on the toilet seats to look like poop. It was kind of disturbing, but damn funny.

Shit Or Get Off The Pot!!!!

As we all know it looks as if there is a good chance that one of the great players of my time will no longer wear a Lakers uniform. As die hard Lakers fan the emotional roller coaster that is the Lakers is becoming incessantly unnerving. I obviously don’t want Kobe to go, but if he is leaving I wish they could just get it done and get him out of here so the Lakers and Lakers fans can get on with their lives and continue to watch Jerry Buss and his family run the Lakers into the ground. If Kobe goes the only upside will be the possibility of a Lottery pick in some up and coming draft. There were so many possible changes the Lakers could have made to appease the situation, but instead the Lakers ownership did nothing. Kobe is by no means perfect, but he wants to win and obvious that is not a priority to the Lakers right now. Kobe was supposedly told by Mitch Kupchak and Jerry Buss that they were committed to building a team capable of a championship around him, but any fan can look at the roster right now and know that isn’t the case. Where’s Jerry West when you need him?

And the new musical theme of Tex Mex is...

I'd like to thank everyone for the overwhelming response (probably my fault because I never update my blog). It's safe to say that we have made some good choices this year that truly fit in with the past Kimchi themes of having great music mixed in with awesomely cheesy music. And the winners are....

AND

The Bee Gees

NBN and I will be sure to come up with some mind blowing compilations until then stay drunk!

Musical Theme for Tex Mex

In the past we have had such great artists as...

Hall and Oates:

David Bowie:

Foreigner:

Wham:

ACDC:

...and the list goes on; however now it is time to choose the new musical King or Queen of Tex Mex. No one has come close to topping the OG kings, Hall and Oates. Their music filled the halls of the Mesa Inn as the first ever Hall and Oates Hash was ran. Now, we need some new music to motivate us in our drunken ways and keep the crazy Tex Mex times rollin...Now who's with me?

Footbal is back!!!

Finally football is back and the Pac-10 had a great weekend only losing one game. I was happy to see my UCLA Bruins dominated Stanford, as they should have. Also the #1 USC Trojans beat the Idaho Vandals in a not so impressive fashion. I'm sure the Trojans are going o step it up when they play #20 Nebraska this weekend otherwise it's going to be a short bid at another National title.
I don't think I have ever been this excited about College football. Maybe it's because the 2 teams I root for have a chance to meet late in the season, undefeated, with some serious BCS implications or is it because my pro team may have an off year. Probably a little bit of both, but I still couldn't pass up the chance to see my team, the K.C. Chiefs, play Houston in the season opener. I was able to get my hands on some nose bleed tickets to the game this weekend and hopefully this will be one of the games the Chiefs win. This will be ESPN's first pro-football game so it should be a blast. Larry Johnson should have good game and I am looking forward to seeing Bowe (rookie wr out of LSU) play. Until next time...this blog has been updated biatch!!!

Rockies vs. Cubs

Here's the deal people my wife and I are going to be in Colorado the weekend of the 11th which is just around the corner. NBN, ESPN, and I are going to go see a baseball game at Coors Field on Sunday the 12th. If anyone else is interested come on down, the more the merrier. We are planning on making a day of it by going up there a while before the game so we can have some beers at Breckenridge Brewery which happens to be right across the street from the stadium

Fun in DC

This past weekend I happened to be in Washington D.C. on business. I worked all day Saturday and once I was done I decided to head back to my hotel and hang out. I was on the phone with NBN and he mentioned that DC was a great hashing town because there are so many groups there that there’s always something going on. By way of Late Night Drive Thru with the help of Assgagger I was able to link up with some DC hashers at Millie and Al’s bar which happened to be the last stop of a pub crawl that started at noon. Millie and Al’s was one of a bunch of bars on 18th street. It was a freakin mad house down there. I felt like I was in Mexico. 18th street is a huge strip of bright lights, bars, 24 hour food places and no god damn parking. I drove around for quite a while looking for parking and trying to call LNDT. While I was circling I probably saw 15 or 20 people get pulled over and 4 or 5 people get towed, all in all that area was pretty interesting. I almost parked in this lot off the strip, but it looked like a scene from the Sopranos. There was a well dressed man off to the side with his cronies doing all the work. I decided I would hold off plus they were charging 15 bucks and you couldn’t park there to late.
I finally got a hold of LNDT and she was able help out. LNDT pointed me to a public parking garage that I had only driven by 10 times or so. It’s one of those tricky places that you would never find unless you lived there or knew someone that lived there. It’s off the strip and down an alley and there are no signs I would have never discovered it in a million years. The whole parking structure was packed and it seemed as if all the parking spaces were smaller than normal spaces. I had an Impala for a rental so I was thinking to my self how great it would be to return a damaged rental care then GOD swooped down in the form of a 40 year old Indian (from India) man guided me to a handicapped parking space with plenty of room. I think it was a fitting parking space for me being that I am Donnie the Retard. I was assured that I wouldn’t get towed and I was off.
Millie and Al’s was a packed house and because there were hashers there they had my favorite drink in the world….FREE BEER. I mingled with the local hashers and everybody seemed to love my name. I think I got asked to sing my song a billion times and I had it sung to me a billion more times. There were even debates on whose version was correct….is it “8lb melon head” or “8lb watermelon head”….is the final line “Hi, my name is Donnie” or “Hi, my name is Donnie I like tater tots”. All in all it was quite amusing especially since everyone had been drinking for 7 or 8 hours. I was there for a little over an hour then I left with LNDT, Ass Spelunker, Hoover Damn (don’t know why she was there I thought she live in the Springs), and another guy whose name I can’t recall to go to a house party.
I think we got to the party to late because everyone was already trashed and I had just missed some flip cup. I tried to get some people to play, but no one felt up to it so I hung out and drank some beers. I met this one hasher I can’t remember her name, but she was mean and sarcastic so we got along swimmingly. She was one of those people who would talk shit about people even though they we right there it’s like she thought they couldn’t hear her. I thought it was funny. She was also obsessed with some pasta salad that she had made. It was in one of those gigantic Tupperware bowls. She was a pretty small girl but she had that big ass bowl in her lap and she was going to town. I guess she was having a “Lay off I’m starving” moment. She actually said and I quote, “this pasta salad is so good I want to go lie on that blanket and have someone pour it all over me.” No joke I was cracking up.
I also meet this guy named Tony who looked just like Steve Carell (the guy from The Office and Anchorman). He sounded just like him and he was pretty damn funny too. Tony had this weird tradition when he came over to this particular house; he had to cook Bacon Grilled cheese. Don’t ask me why. I hung out and drank a couple more beers with him while he cooked a butt load of bacon and made sandwiches. Later I had a couple Bacon Grilled cheese, sobered up and drove back to the hotel. It was a low key hash evening, but I had had a great time. Thanks for the idea NBN, Assgagger thanks for getting me the right phone numbers and LNDT thanks for leading me around. This mothafuckin blog has been updated BITCHES!!!

Yellow Jackets vs. Energy Drinks

VS.

When attending a hash weekend every hasher at one time or another has come to a point where they are running ragged and need a little pick me up. We've all been there and a while back my pick me up of choice was the Yellow jacket which could be purchased at almost any convenience store or gas station. Those bad boys would do the trick, but coming down off of them was no joke. You feel like you just drank a bunch of caffeine, smoked some crack, and did a couple lines (not that I know what doing any drugs like that is like) then you crash and burn. That coupled with being hung over can be a very painful experience.

Exibit A: A couple years back Espn, NBN, and I went to the Virginia Interhash. It was your standard hash weekend with camping and lots of beer as you can imagine. Well day two came around and NBN, Espn, and I were sucking all motivation had left our bodies. Then we told ourselves No!!! We will not let or hangovers conquer us so we busted out the Yellow jackets. We each took two, which in hind sight was pretty retard considering we already knew the after affects of booze and those crack pills. All I can say is by 10 pm Espn was dressed like a pimp, I had a red wig and strapless dress on and NBN was dressed in blow up ballerina outfit (he looked like he was pushing about 400, it was hot). Regardless the evening continued and we played every drinking game known to man, participated in a talent show, watched some topless boxing, saw a Hasher named Buck-a-fufalo try to hump numerous people while butt naked(normal behavior for him), and ended by a camp fire, bullshitting, and passing liquor around. All in all it was great night that would not have been possible with out the help of Yellow Jackets. Espn and I retired around 4am and NBN crawled into the tent about 6am, but we had to be up 830am because NBN had a flight to catch and that is when the wrath of the Yellow Jacket finally took its toll. I wasn't feeling great but I could see my partners in crime were hurting pretty bad.

We packed up and were set to hit the road when ESPN looked up me with that special look and blew chunks at my feet. That was our queue to get going. Now the first 10 mile of this trip took forever because of multiple puke stops for Espn, then NBN started feeling left so he began contributing. The second stop the car hadn't even come to a complete stop when ESPN began puking out the window. Seconds later NBN threw himself half way out the window and started yelling for his buddy Ralph. For the next couple mile they alternated yakking then we were off and moving. That was the last time we took Yellow Jackets and drank heavily. Lesson learned. Now it's time to move on to greener pastures.

This is where energy drinks I have used energy drinks many times to keep me going and I have never had symptoms like when we used Yellow jackets. Now I am not saying you don't feel it the next morning, but the after affects are nowhere near as fierce. This is why I believe energy drinks will be helpful for this coming BFE. NBN won't take anymore 4 hour naps, ESPN won't need some "alone" time which is code for a nap, and I won't get tired. So people, for right now energy drinks are a go for BFE. What does everyone else think? Which is better?

Master List!!!

BFE is now exactly two weeks away and it is time to compile the master list so we know what we need.

1. Boom box
2. Beer Pong table (everything that comes with balls, net, cup triangle etc...)
3. CD's(Hall and Oates, Average White Band, Jamiroqui)
4. Brass Monkey equipment (OE and OJ).
5. Cards
6. Poker chips (for morning poker)
7. Poker table
8. Money for Lip Lock Me and Humidor
9. Boones Farm
10. Cigars
11. Sunscreen(unless you're Mexican like NBN)
12. Emergen C
13. Granny panties
14. Mirrored aviator glasses
15. Hostage gnome
16. Dice
17. Bratwurst
18. Buns
19. Mustard
20. Pineapple Margarita Parts (Tequila, etc....)
21. Tent
22. Grill
23. Carne Asada
24. Tortillas
25. 2-3 jugs of water
26. 2-3 jugs of gatorade
27. Jockey Box
28. Keg of Dos Equis
29. Limes
30. Cups (make sure they are right size for beer bong)
31. Paper plates
32. Ice
33. Sleeping bags
34. Air matress
35. Pillows
36. Chairs
37. TP (just in case)
38. Toiletries
39. Bar
40. Tapatio
41. Clothes
42. Happy Shirts
43. Napkins or paper towels
44. Trash bags
45. Energy Drinks so NBN doesn't take any 4 hour naps
46. Snacks that go good with beer(Pretzels..etc)
47. water balloon launcher and water balloons for human beer pong

That's it for now feel free to add stuff....

Official BFE Newsletter # 2

There has been a disturbing lack of enthusiasm with the planning of BFE. Lets get motivated people because this is going to be the best BFE yet.

1. First who all is coming so we split up the Master List and make sure we have enough sick little monkeys coming to participate in the Brat toss, Beer Pong, and Flippy Cup. If you are thinking of not coming you are wrong, you know you are. I have heard all the lame excuses I can take such as: “I can't come because I'm too Jewish", "I can't come because I'm pregnant", "I can't come because I am gay and I live in Philadelphia", "I can't come because I have to go to NTC, hey have you seen my turkey baster and a jar of Vaseline laying around". Blah Blah Blah

2. I know NBN is taking care of reserving the KEG...I am guessing we are going to stick with tradition and go Mexican with some tasty and delectable Dos Equis. The question is should we go Amber or Special Lager?

or

3. Are we going to make another attempt at playing human beer pong. If we don't do the least we could is use it to bring the balloon launcher to have a little fun. Oh dear lord we could use the launcher for the Brat toss that way no one is safe...muhhahahaha!

4. What's our musical theme going to be obviously Hall and Oates will be incorporated, but we need something good this year? Any Idea's?

5. If you really truly care about BFE then send any and all donations to the "Brownie's a flaming Homo-sexual fund". You can find donation drop offs at your local Air Force recruiter.
POOP

"I think I'm walking on air...So much in love I can't tell what I'm saying...There'll be no running away...You and I won't be apart again...I know in my heart that we can start again...Wait for the summer...When love's in the air...You won't be sorry...You answered my prayer"

DTR

Leaving on a Jet Plane!!!

The hour is near and soon I will be off to Colorado to freeze my ass off and drink some beer with my hetero-lifmate, his awesome wife, and all you crazy kimchi assholes...wooohoooo!!!!!!!! Then tomorrow comes the Platte Road challenge, 12 bars 2.48 miles, I'm gonna put my heart into it and god willing I will finish alongside my kimchi brethren. C-4 I sent you my itinerary but just in case you check this first my plane comes in at 7:44pm I am not checking bags so I should be off the plane pretty quick. I can't wait to make C4 and NBN's basement bedroom smell like a giant fart after a long night of drinking. Until 7:44 pm I bid you all ado.

Good vs.Evil Part 2

I am happy to say that the UCLA Bruins have not disappointed with their second consecutive run to NCAA Final Four. They look ahead to the very team that nearly destroyed them last year in the title game. Evil is lurking and the Sith is on the rise...there is a great disturbance in the NCAA force and only Obi-wan Howland and his band of Bruins have a chance at thwarting Darth Maul Donovan and his evil Gators. This is a battle for the ages and shall go down in NCAA lore. As long as the Bruins use the force in their favor, unlike they did last year, they should have a chance at beating the Gators who hale from the SEC (Sith Evil-warlord Conference). Bruins may your defense be swift and your 3-pointers fall like rain. GO BRUINS!....to be continued

VS.

Good vs.Evil

Tonight the ultimate struggle between good and evil will take place. Obi-wan Howland and his team of intergalactic UCLA Bruins will take on the evil Pitt Panthers and their leader Darth Dixon. This should be a battle of epic proportions!

VS.

Can the Bruins shutdown defense hold down the Panthers? Will Good prevail or will the Dark Side take hold of March madness??????? To Be Continued....

Brass Monkey H3????

Lately I have been tossing around some ideas with NBN and Espn about trying to start hash in the Woodlands/Spring area which is located north of Houston. It would be something simple, but I would need some help getting it going. I think I have found a kind of silent partner, but nothing is solid yet. Part of the reason I want to do this is I enjoy hashing, but I haven’t been doing as much hashing as of late because the closest hashes can be a bit of drive. The H4 and Mosquito Hashes are some great people; however it still takes me 45 minutes or longer to get to a hash for the most part. I figured as long as I don't step on any toes, which I don't plan to do, it might turn out pretty good if we can get some hashers together.
Now I was thinking of maybe doing a bi-weekly run opposite the Mosquito hash, and because the H4 run on Sunday it shouldn't interfere with their run. This would also enable me to support the H4 and Mosquito hashes which is something I would like to do. These are just some ideas I am throwing around. One of the things I need most is people in the area that might be interested. That's where all you hashers come in...anyone know any hashers in the Woodlands, Spring or Conroe areas that might be interested? If you do and you could put us in touch that would be awesome. Also, I wanted to know what you think of some logos that NBN put together for me. Any comments or ideas would be welcome. We thought the main mascot should be a forty and we named him 8-ball for obvious reasons. ONON

Houston 1500th Beer Pong Kings!!!

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Who am I?

If you can name this blogger....."I will update when I want or when I get tired of hearing your whinning ass bitches". By the way it's spelled whining(I am surprised NBN didn’t catch that).First one to guess get's a Brass Monkey.

I, unlike the blogger in question don't care and actually enjoy the comments about my lack of updating. NBN's latest rant on my lack of updating was quite amusing and in a weird way made me feel special. I apologize for not updating my blog in a while, but nothing of interest has been happening as of late besides the Lakers sucking balls and the unfortunate passing of my Grandmother-in-law. I am counting the days until the Platte Road Challenge and in the mean time I will be attending H4's 1500 in about a week in a half. I plan to show these Houstonites how we get down Kimchi style (brass monkey's and beer pong). Unfortunately I will not get to share this Hash experience with my beautiful wife because she will be in Long Beach paying tribute to her Grandmother who recently passed away. Everyone drink a beer or pour out a little of your 40 oz in memory of our fallen homies and Grandma Lucy Sievers. Through all this ESPN is doing well and misses everyone. This blog has now been updated BITCHES!!!

Platte Road Challenge Here I come!!!!

I just purchased my plane ticket to Colorado for the Platte Road Challenge. I am very excited about once again meeting up with my Kimchi Brothers and Sisters for a weekend of drinking, beer pong, and if were lucky Human Beer Pong. I had an idea for the night before the challenge. Of course a MOPP would be awesome, but we should have a Beer Pong Tournament we could call the Kimchi World Series of Beer Pong (I’m sure coming up with a cool/gay inexpensive prize such as some Brass Monkeys). Just a thought, but regardless I am looking forward to that weekend.

Sadly No Human Beer Pong!!!!

I feel it is a great injustice that we did not even attempt to play human beer pong. However, the water balloon launcher was pretty sweet. There's nothing like bombarding a bunch of unsuspecting hashers with some water balloon artillery, too bad we didn't have any shaving or whip cream....because we could have made some "special artillery". We'll have to save that idea for next time. All in all I think the first outing of the balloon launcher was a success, although we did discover you should probably try to aim away from glass objects (some drunken hasher told me you could easily break a window from about 40 yards, but I would have to see it to believe it). I think Bloody Z has the launcher, but I am not entirely sure....I just know I don't have it. We should definitely bring the launcher to all hash events.

Kimchi Ball Check!!!

Well it appears that everyone made it back safely after a truly awesome time at Tex Mex. I figured I would throw out one last Kimchi ball check. So out of all the people that were issued balls how many actually ended up with a Pong Ball at the end of the weekend? That is the question. Those that answer no let the punishment be slamming a Brass Monkey at the next hash. I will let NBN be the enforcer of the punishment because I will not be able to be at the next Kimchi Hash for obvious reasons.

FINAL MASTER LIST!!!!!

Well folks Tex-Mex is upon us and I have compiled everyone’s responses this is the (mostly) final list I have for our up and coming KICK ASS weekend.
1. Boom box
2. Beer Pong table (everything that comes with balls, net, cup triangle etc...)
3. CD's (at least one Hall and Oates cd so we can run the Hall and Oates hash)
4. Brass Monkey equipment (OE and OJ) if we are not getting it in ElPaso.
5. Presents for spotty
6. Valid I.D. ( for Mexico)
7. Cards
8. Poker chips (for morning poker)
9. Poker table (if you guys have room, if not we can figure something out)
10. Money (for what ever dabaucherous activities you decide to partake in)
11. Boxed wine
12. Jager
13. Tuaca
14. Boones Farm
15. Cigars
16. Sunscreen(unless you're Mexican like NBN)
17. Emergen C
18. Granny panties
19. C-4's Mexican scavenger hunt (I told her bring back and 8 foot crucifix would be a little hard)
20. Mirrored aviator glasses
21. Porn mustache
22. Hostage gnome
23. Dice
24. Tequila Rose
25. Mimi the midget doll
26. Village people costumes (very important)



That's the list and we are sticking to it...... Mexico here we come!!!

Master List / Musical Theme for TEX MEX

All righty people Tex Mex is just around the corner and we need to come up with a Master list and some music to bring. It was mentioned on NBN's blog about O.E. and if they sell it in El Paso. I am guessing they do, but we will definitely need to confirm that. I will start a short list and people can add things. Then later on I will take everyone's responses and recreate the list we can also put it in the Newsletter if there ever is a second one (ahem NBN).

1. Boom box
2. Beer Pong table (everything that comes with balls, net, cup triangle etc...)
3. CD's (at least one Hall and Oates cd so we can run the Hall and Oates hash)
4. Brass Monkey equipment (OE and OJ) if we are not getting it in ElPaso.5.
6. Valid I.D. ( for Mexico)
7. Cards
8. Poker chips (for morning poker)
9. Poker table (if you guys have room, if not we can figure something out)
10. Money(for what ever dabaucherous activities you decide to partake in)
11.Poop

I know there's more I can't think of, but that is why we are starting a list people.......