BMH3 #437 - 10/24/2026 - Vagina Shinz - I got my EYE on YOU

   

 

 

We Need Hares for both trails in November! Let mismanagement know or Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3 Once all trails this year are claimed, we'll open up 2027 trails!

BMH3 #437 - 10/24/2026 - Vagina Shinz - I got my EYE on YOU

 

When: 

Saturday, October Twenty Fourth, TwentyTwentySix
• Who the fuck knows

Where:

If you are coming to the run:

From the greater Houston area, the best bet is to come up on 249 until you get to the FM 1774 / Plantersville exit. Then head south on FM 1774 and travel 2 miles to the Festival entrance. The construction concerns of the past are mostly gone. This has become the best way to get to TRF and has made the festival a lot closer to Houston. If you are coming from The Woodlands, you can also take FM 1488 to FM 1774 and turn north.

Alternatively:

(1) Take I-45 to Hwy 105 in Conroe. Go west on 105 to FM 1774 in Plantersville. Turn south onto FM 1774 and travel 6 miles to the Festival entrance.

(2) Take Hwy 290 to Hwy 6 to Navasota. In Navasota take Hwy 105 to FM 1774 in Plantersville. Turn south on FM 1774 and go 6 miles to the Festival entrance. These routes may cause you to travel more miles, but can actually save you time and frustration.

If you are coming to camp out:

If you are coming from 249 (Aggie Express) onto FM 1774. In about 1.8 miles turn right on County Road 302. Approximately in 0.67 mile your entrance will be on your left, shortly after the railroad tracks. It won't be the first entrance, it will be the second one on your left.

If you are coming from Magnolia on FM 1774 as soon as you see the faire entrance, keep straight for about another mile until you reach County Road 302 on your left. Follow for another 0.67 mile and you will reach your destination. Shortly past the railroad tracks, it won't be the first entrance, it will be the second one on your left.

Hares: 

Vagina Shinz

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:  

I think enough of you have been to the Renaissance Festival to know what the fuck is about to go down. Especially if you are camping with the Hash and the Ren... folk. If you dont, I am excited to tell you that this shit is going to get weird and I dont mean Hash weird. The Ren people go extra hard for the nightly events. I recommend staying sobberish for the actual festival and then going hard for the campground events. 

P.S. Pack for cold nights

Bring:

Water to drink! To stay hydrated!

Camping gear so you can stay comfy and not possibly find yourself awoken on a beer soaked street with people all around you. It's happened to me so shut your dirty mouth thinking it couldn't happen

My name is Twinkle Toes. Let you roar it through the night

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=- 

BMH3 #436 - 10/10/2026 - Ivanna Hairy Buttchug Turns 63!!!

  

 

 

We Need Hares for both trails in November! Let mismanagement know or Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3 Once all trails this year are claimed, we'll open up 2027 trails!

BMH3 #436 - 10/10/2026 - Ivanna Hairy Buttchug Turns 63!!!

 

When: 

Saturday, October Tenth, TwentyTwentySix
• Main Pack 2pm show, 2:30PM Go

Where:

Where: Burger King (Home of the Burger King, can I take your order?)
3595 FM 1488, Conroe, TX 77384

https://maps.app.goo.gl/h2AmFfwRMQa2Lx2t5

30°13'38.2"N 95°31'07.8"W

***We are parking at the end, and will be doing Car Fronts to the begining of trail! DONT BE LATE*** 

The address is to the Burger King but follow the link or coordinates to the exact parking area. Very near Burger King

Hares: 

Ivanna Hairy Buttchug

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:  

 ***We are parking at the end, and will be doing Car Fronts to the begining of trail! DONT BE LATE*** 

Ivanna turns 63!!! Such a big number. Born in 1963. Such a coincidence. Golden? It certainly looks like it. Wait….he is 6’3”. What the ….? This is a once in a life time event. 63 is everywhere. Ivannas 63rd birthday trail is upon us and there will be so many things that will cum in 6’s and 3’s! Don’t worry, there won’t be 6 buzzballs 🤣 but there will be all the shiggy, 3 drink checks, lots of trail ( between .63 and 63 miles), a pool on after with a home cooked dinner. Cum help Ivanna celebrate this monumental birthday! It could be his last one, who knows? Please RSVP so Indiana can plan for enough food and not be embarrassed when way too many assholes show up. If you don’t Facebook find another way. Send Indiana a message on Signal or send a smoke signal, anything. She gets really pissed when she doesn’t have enough food for all of the halfminds at on after.

 

Bring:

Water to drink! it is still HOT!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

A Shag bag, so you can have your stuff at the nest!

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=- 

 

BMH3 #435 09/26/2026 10th Anal Flock You!

 

 

 

We Need Hares for 10/24(HALLOWEEN!!!), and both trails in November! Let mismanagement know or Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3 Once all trails this year are claimed, we'll open up 2027 trails!

BMH3 #435    09/26/2026    10th Anal Flock You!

 

When: 

Saturday, September TwentySixth, TwentyTwentySix
• Main Pack EARLY 2PM show, 2:30PM Go

Where:

Where: George Mitchell Preserve Flintridge Trailhead/ Flintridge Bike Trails
 5171 Flintridge Dr, The Woodlands, TX 77381

https://maps.app.goo.gl/4JfCxBukvmKreYWs9

30.162931118665269, -95.51750834669169

Hares: 

Dumpsterbaitor, Indiana Bones, Mouth Organ, Outside Cat and Womb Raider

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES: 

Can this really be the 10th Anal Flock You?!?  FLOCK YES!!! Get your feathers ready and pucker up your little cloacas. If you make the right choice and cum, you will get: THREE AWESOME MIGRATIONS/TRAILS, A KICKASS PATCH, “PRIZES”, COPIOUS AMOUNTS OF BOOZE & CANNIBALISTIC HOT BIRD FOOD! ALL FOR THE LOW LOW PRICE OF $5! With this economy, you can’t afford not to cum! As is Flock You tradition, there will be the Robin (Orange), the Dove (White) and the Blue Bird (Blue) trails 1.5 to 2 miles each laid in different colors of flour. ALL trails will start and end at the Nest filled with all the things. Leave the Nest as many or as few times as you like. Duckies have once again wandered from the Nest. Bring them back for special “prizes”! Wear your best feathers or Wedding dress! We can’t wait to see our flock!!!

 

Bring:

Water to drink! it is still HOT!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

A Shag bag, so you can have your stuff at the nest!

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=- 

 

BMH3 #434 - 09/12/2026 - Ask Me Something Personal & KatchUp Drain The Bottle Trail

We Need Hares for 10/24 (HALLOWEEN!!!), and both trails in November! Let mismanagement know or Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3 

BMH3 #434 - 09/12/2026 - Ask Me Something Personal & KatchUp 

When: 

Saturday, September Twelfth, TwentyTwentySix

Main Pack 3PM show, 3:30PM Go

Where:

Kroger Parking Lot East Side

2150 Spring Stuebner Rd, Spring, TX 77389

30.084819082187273, -95.4472120160876

https://maps.app.goo.gl/NQcgC2YF5NxYL7Az8

Hares: 

Ask Me Something Personal & KatchUp

Sidenote From The Hare:

This looks to be a fun trail. Looking at 3-4 miles with a nice beer check. There may be some water crossings since the rain has been absolutely amazing this week.

 

Bring:

Water to drink! it is HOT again!

TOWEL and Swimsuit for the POOL 

Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 

Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

A Shag bag, so you can have your stuff at the end!

Why: 

Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:

Who do I look like, Spork?  Fucking put the address into your phone and get your own damn directions.

• Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
• Cocktor Spork's # (832) 372-5133
• KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n Bitches,

Cocktor Spork

BMH3 #433 - 08/29/2026 - Cocktor Spork & Indiana Bones' AИAL Birfday Trail!

We Need Hares for 9/12, 10/24 (HALLOWEEN!!!), and both trails in November! Let mismanagement know or Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3 

BMH3 #433 - 08/29/2026 - Cocktor Spork & Indiana Bones' AИTrail!AL Birfday 

When: 

Saturday, August Twenty-Ninth, TwentyTwentySix

Main Pack 3PM show, 3:30PM Go

Where:

Alden Bridge Sports Park

4751 TX-242

The Woodlands, TX 77384

30.206059, -95.497783

6G43+G2 The Woodlands, Texas

https://maps.app.goo.gl/Zh1aus7xHeLUcVnm7

Hares: 

Cocktor Spork & Indiana Bones and the Temple of Poon

Sidenote From The Hare:

It’s the tiiiimeee

AH

Of the season

AH

When the sluts run dryY

Ok, well, that’s because it’s August, and it’s hot as balls.  So, what are we going to do?  We’re going to get drunk, call each other names, then go to a pool and make bad decisions into the wee(ner) hours of the morning.

That’s right friends, it’s that time of year again.  Cocktor Spork & Indiana Bones present our AИAL BIRFDAY TRAIL!  Like always, you can expect 3+ miles of shiggy, at least one beer check (maybe more depending on, like, you know, things), and a RELAXING AS FUCK POOL 0N-AFTER!

But WAIT, THERE’S MORE!  Not only will there be a pool, with a hot tub, with bad decisions running rampant, but there will also be a taco bar with chips and queso.  YUMMMMMMM!

What do you need to bring?  Your own damn booze and a towel.  Also, RSVP, so the hosts know how many assholes they are cooking for.  Wow, what amazing people those Spork and Indiana Bones are.  Just fantastic. 

So, what do you need to do?

STEP 1: RSVP that you are cumming to enjoy Cocktor Spork & Indiana Bones’ AИAL Birfday trail!

STEP 2: Pack a towel and your own beer, wine, moonshine, tub whiskey, whatever, that you will use for 0n-After.

STEP 3: Do an AMAZING trail, then head to the pool to swim and taco bar your face off!

And that’s it!  WOW!  Could not be easier… unless you are a lazy piece of shit that decides not to cum to this, which would be bad.  Don’t be bad.  Be good.  Be a hasher.  A good bad hasher that hashes.  Especially hashing this trail!

Cum one, cum all, YOU WON’T WANNA MISS IT!

 

Bring:

Water to drink! it is HOT again!

TOWEL and Swimsuit for the POOL 

Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 

Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

A Shag bag, so you can have your stuff at the end!

Why: 

Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:

Who do I look like, Spork?  Fucking put the address into your phone and get your own damn directions.

• Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
• Cocktor Spork's # (832) 372-5133
• KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n Bitches,

Cocktor Spork

BMH3 #432 08/15/2026 2 Menanite LIVEns things up!

 

We Need Hares for 9/12, 10/24(HALLOWEEN!!!), and both trails in November! Let mismanagement know or Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3 

BMH3 #432    08/15/2026   2 Menanite LIVEns things up!(aka Don't Tell Coogs Hashers Not Trashers^2)

 

When: 

Saturday, August Fifteenth, TwentyTwentySix
• Main Pack 3PM show,3:30PM Go

Where:

403 Westbrook street, Pinehurst TX

 30.121237674137369, -95.65285546182769

https://maps.app.goo.gl/G7gKxS3VKXZFTRgVA 

Hares: 

2-Menanite

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARE: The "Dont tell Coogs" Hashers (Not Trashers)^2.

You Will get wet on trail!

If there are no scheduled showings:
POOL ENDING!!! BUT you have to leave the place CLEARNER(just copying what he sent me) then when you arrived!!!!

If a showing fucks thus up, start will be "before you get to my street", and we may loose the pool ending.

 

Bring:

Water to drink! it is HOT again!

TOWEL and Swimsuit for the POOL 
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

A Shag bag, so you can have your stuff at the end!

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=- 

 

BMH3 #431 08/01/2026 Short Cummingz and Just Stephanie Pool ON AFTER!

 

 

We Need Hares for the very next trail and beyond! Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3 When its hot trails can be shorter!

 

BMH3 #431    08/01/2026    Short Cummingz and Just Stephanie Pool ON AFTER!

When: 

Saturday, August First, TwentyTwentySix
• Main Pack 3PM show,3:30PM Go

Where:

George Mitchell Preserve trailhead

at the end of Dr Ann Snyder Dr. The Woodlands, TX 77375 

https://maps.app.goo.gl/AUSGMjGMTe81enQG8

30.148811929877669, -95.56336417515669

 

Hares: 

Short Cummingz

Just Stephanie 

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES: Cum join Just Stephanie for her first lay of a Brass Monkey trail! Short Cummingz is joining her, so there is a moderate chance of getting lost. It will be A to B, with a pool on after. 2-5 miles

Bring:

Water to drink! it is HOT again!

TOWEL and Swimsuit for the POOL 
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

A Shag bag, so you can have your stuff at the end!

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=- 

BMH3 #430 07/18/2026 - Workless Cocks Second Anal Reservoir ramble through a dicks

 

We Need Hares in August and beyond! Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3 When its hot trails can be shorter!

 

BMH3 #430 07/18/2026 Workless Cocks Second Anal Reservoir ramble through a dicks, and POOL ON INAFTER!

When: 

Saturday, July Eighteenth, TwentyTwentySix
• Main Pack 3PM show,3:30PM Go

Where:

https://maps.app.goo.gl/i5CP15D6SdYk5aVa6

29.829703567882969, -95.61784664325369 

Hares: 

Workless Cock

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES: Workless Cock says "Oh man. We're gonna have a time out there... Two of the roads I need were closed for flooding today... Rainy looking week, so perhaps a sloshy good time!" ON AFTER On in/After will be at WORKLESS COCKS POOL!!!! SO BRING A TOWEL! Also they'll have snacks and probably be grillling!

Bring:

Water to drink! it is HOT again!

TOWEL and Swimsuit for the POOL 
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

A Shag bag, so you can have your stuff at the end!

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=- 

BMH3 #429 07/04/2026 The 4th of DILFs Trail!

  

We Need Hares in July and beyond! Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3

 

BMH3 #429 07/04/2026 The 4th of DILFs Trail! 

When: 

Saturday, July Fourth-Twenty, TwentyTwentySix
• Main Pack 3PM show,3:30PM Go 

Where:

Water Control & Improvement District

23802 Glen Loch Drive, The Woodlands, TX  77380

(Southern End of Glen Loch Road)

(30.1134824, -95.4891605)

https://maps.app.goo.gl/25AqxxDN6qfvucvK8

Hares: 

Cocktor Spork and Ivanna Hairy Buttchug 

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES: 

Ladies and Gents, Boys and Girls, people of all ages that can legally drink, it's time to get excited! This year, your hares, Cocktor Spork and Ivanna Hairy Buttchug will be laying you the FIRST AИAL DILF Trail! That's right, we've celebrated the womb, not it's time to celebrate the sperm! This was the closest trail to Father's Day available, so we grabbed it... and our dicks... and went for it!

*Jizz Hands*

Not only will we be laying the FIRST AИAL DILF Trail, it will also be on the 4th of July! So it will be a DILFs in Sparklerland celebration as well! Like Babes in Toyland, but less racism.

Will there be fireworks? 

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

Will there be sparklers?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

Will there be bad decisions and a POOL ON AFTER?

YAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSS!

That's right, after our beautiful 4-5 mile shiggytastic trail, you can plan to cool down at the Maison de Hairy Poon (trademark pending). So cum on out to celebrate the DILFs, the fireworks, and the POOL on after! See you there, you won't want to miss it!

Bring:

Water! it is HOT again!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

A Shag bag, so you can have your stuff at the end!

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=- 

BMH3 #428 06/20/2026 Outside Cats Birthday Extravaganza!

 

We Need Hares in July and beyond! Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3

 

BMH3 #428 06/20/2026 Outside Cats Birthday Extravaganza!

When: 

Saturday, June Twentieth, TwentyTwentySix
• Main Pack 3PM show,3:30PM Go

Where:

 Grogan's Mill Village Center

7 Switchbud Pl, The Woodlands, TX 77380 

30.14180084769469, -95.46983053871869

https://maps.app.goo.gl/PzBhrw52hLWt8QjZ8 

Hares: 

Outside Cat

Super Secret Surprise CoHare 

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES: 

Outside Cat has a wonderful 3-5 mile trail extravaganza in store! Trail will be A to A'ish, so bring a shag bag!  You'll likely be getting wet! 

Bring:

Water! it is HOT again!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

A Shag bag, so you can have your stuff at the end!

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=- 

BMH3 #427 06/06/2026 Dim Reaper and Resting Boot Face's 6'6" Tall Person Trail.

 

 

 

 

We Need Hares in July and beyond! Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3

 

BMH3 #427    06/06/2026 Dim Reaper and Resting Boot Face's 6'6" Tall Person Trail.

When: 

Saturday, June Sixth, TwentyTwentySix
• Main Pack 3PM show,3:30PM Go

Where:

Timarron Park & Sprayground

200 N Greenprint Cir, The Woodlands, TX 77375 

 https://maps.app.goo.gl/HYiSYUpy9gkorBzE7 

30.155146450747269, -95.55184647911269

Hares: 

Dim Reaper

Resting Boot Face 

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES: 

A to B trail 

4.5-5 miles

Bring:

Water! it is HOT again!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

A Shag bag, so you can have your stuff at the end!

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=- 

Brass Monkey H3 #426 05/23/2026 Cockulator

 

 

 

 

We Need Hares in July and beyond! Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3

 

 Brass Monkey #426    05/23/2026    Cockulator

When: 

Saturday, May TwentyThird, TwentyTwentySix
• Main Pack 3PM show,3:30PM Go

Where: 

11710 Grant Rd, Cypress, TX 77429

29.974525520950269, -95.59922668336669

https://maps.app.goo.gl/N22iUj7FjkEh29b48 

 

Hares: 

Cockulator

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:This should be about 4 miles with one beer check. We’ll have to see how the weather holds up but I’ll get you wet one way or another. This is expected to be A-B. The drive from start isn’t far but idk if that matters

Bring:

Water! it is HOT again!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

A Shag bag, so you can have your stuff at the end!

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=- 

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 425 - Ayran Sisterhoods annual death day trail

 

We Need Hares in May and beyond! Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3

BRASS MONKEY H3 R*N # 425 - Ayran Sisterhoods annual death day trail

When: 

Saturday, May Ninth, TwentyTwentySix
• Main Pack 3PM show, 3:30PM Go

Where: *Under a Creepy Bridge*

Riley Fuzzel Road

Spring, TX 77386

Creepy Bridge Underpass

(30.134616, -95.350272)

 Hares: Aryan Sisterhood

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES: The hare makes no promises about the 4+ mile trail that lies ahead, only that it will test your legs and your liver. Whether you're knee deep in mud, chest deep in water, or completely lost in the woods, know that the pack is always lost and/or probably lost.

Dress for shiggy and expect to call 411 to make it back to the start

Bring:

Something! The gods are mad at us for not having enough orgies to appease them. it is starting to get warm again!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Probably a towel for drying off your wet feetsies

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=KatchUp=-

Brass Monkey #424 04/25/2026 Rocker Whore Trail for Just Jude’s Birfday!

We Need Hares in May and beyond! Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3

 

 Brass Monkey #424 04/25/2026 Rocker Whore Trail for Just Jude’s Birfday!

When: 

Saturday, April TwentyFifth, TwentyTwentySix
• Main Pack 3PM show, 3:30PM Go

Where: 

Parking-Lake at Springwoods Village Nature Preserve

30.1029194624112, -95.45670659945951

 

Hares: 

Just Jude, Mouth Organ and Womb Raider

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES: Dress in your favorite Rocker Whore Leopard Print, Heavy Eyeliner, Smudged Makeup and Ripped Fishnets as we celebrate our favorite Rocker Just Jude’s Birfday! Be ready to relive your concert glory days with Mosh Pit and Sharpie Autographs checks, cheap booze and bad decisions. Like any good Hard Rock show we will get you wet and maybe bloody. Trail will be 3-4 miles of Shiggy, thorns and water crossings with at least 1 beer check. On-After will continue the Rockfest with a Karaoke room just for us Rocker Whores at Ale & Ivey!

Bring:

Something! The gods are mad at us for not having enough orgies to appease them. it is starting to get warm again!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Probably a towel for drying off your wet feetsies

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=KatchUp=- 

Brass Monkey #423 04/11/2026 3rd Anal Tax Day trail hared by Ivanna and Indiana

 

We Need Hares in May and beyond! Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3

 

 Brass Monkey #423 04/11/2026 3rd Anal Tax Day trail hared by Ivanna and Indiana

When: 

Saturday, April Eleventh, TwentyTwentySix
• Main Pack 2PM show, 2:30PM Go

Where: 

WG Jones State Forest Trail Head

West of peoples road on the south side of FM 1488, Conroe, TX 77384

30.23435910875069, -95.48216375765869

https://maps.app.goo.gl/7bMoz1LedpMqFTwM7

 

Hares: 

Ivanna Hairy Buttchug

Indiana Bones and the Temple of Poon

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES:Saturday will be the 3rd Anal Tax Day trail hared by Ivanna and Indiana yet again! Brass Monkeys should be dreading this trail almost as much as they dread filing their taxes! There will be accounting related hash marks, shiggy, water crossings, shot check AND beer check! What we will NOT have is a tunnel…unless we find one while laying trail 🐒! Just to honor the confusing nature of tax preparation, this will be B to A…sort of. Meet up is the end, we will transport everyone to trail start so don’t be late!!! Trail will include some shiggy that we have not hashed in for quite a long time, maybe even virgin territory for some hashers! There will be a pool on after with a taco bar, chips and queso, etc. BYO drinks to on after and a towel. If you need a swimsuit, bring one! Please RSVP so we know how much food to make!

Bring:

Water! it is starting to get warm again!
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Probably a towel for drying off your wet feetsies

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=- 

Brass Monkey #422 03/28/26 Monkeys Invade the Galveston 300th

    

 

We Need Hares in May & June and beyond! Sign up here: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3

 

Brass Monkey #422 03/28/26 Monkeys Invade the Galveston 300th

When: 

Saturday, March Twenty-Eighth, TwentyTwentySix
2PM Show, 2:30PM Go.

Where:

1776 Memorial park

FM 2351 and Imperial Rd.

Friendswood, TX 77546

 

https://maps.app.goo.gl/262myRZkWAWnGjhK9

 

29.541471364532369, -95.19669808629569 

 

Hares: 

Pimp Doggie Dawg

Sidenote:

FROM THE HARES: 

It will be Shiggy, some waist deep water crossings, include 3 counties, beer check, tunnel(Bring a light!), probably some baby PI peaking out. The ladies are planning on some hot food and lone pint is donating some beer.

FROM THE MISMANAGEMENT:

This is a joint event with the Galveston hash! We're invading their 300th trail celebration!  They'll have food, beer, and even shirts(only guaranteed if you rego in time)

  You'll need to rego at their google rego or on their HashRego

We recommend you join their facebook event and direct any questions directly to them: https://fb.me/e/1WXvEaE6q8

 

Bring:

APPROPRIATE CLOTHING. Who do I look like the fucking weatherman?
Your fucking self and everything you need to survive a trail on your own. 
Drinking vessels for Brass Monkeys at circle.

Probably a towel for drying off your wet feetsies

Why: Because you like drinking, period.

D’erections:
FROM HOUSTON: Who do I look like, Spōrk? Fucking put the where into your phone and get your own directions.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? Sorry, can't hear you. (P.S. We're not sorry.)
Signal Group: https://tinyurl.com/BMHHH3CHAT
Cocktor Spork's #: (832) 372-5133
KatchUp's #: (817) 235-6141

0n-0n,
-=Twinkle Toes=- 

!